How to maintain a healthy weight with a history of disordered eating

[Ilovefruitytea]

Hi all,

I posted this in the weight loss section but I've now realised that perhaps it's more relevant here.

I was wondering if you could help me. I have a history of an eating disorder (obsessive calorie counting, food rules, weight gain and loss cycles etc). For the last six years, I would say I was free of this. However, my weight has gradually crept up as a result.

I am naturally not a slim person. My dad is overweight and so is his side of the family (though my mum is slim). I did one of those genetic tests that suggest that my genetics means that I’m likely to weigh more on a diet high in saturated fat.

I used to stay slim by calorie counting. People always thought I was very slim naturally as I’m short and so they would comment “oh you’re so petite”. However, I was obsessed with weighing myself and calories and I don’t ever want to go back to that life, it was miserable and obsessive and robbed me of all creativity and happiness!

However, I feel like the alternative of eating whatever I want is not sustainable either. Thing is - I don’t particularly eat badly at all. I eat healthy! Fruit, veg, carbs, meat etc. I don’t really eat cakes or junk food. But in the last six years I’ve gained a lot of weight. I didn’t weigh myself (unless at the doctor’s). But I’ve been feeling large and also I don't want to go the other way and become overweight. But I weighed myself today and I’ve got a BMI of 25. So I went from BMI of 18 to 25 within 6 years and I don’t want it to enter unhealthy category.

I don’t eat unhealthy. I just have a big appetite and so does my dad’s side of the family. I just eat a lot of healthy foods and also I feel hungry easily - I seem to eat often and much more than others!

For info: I gave birth two years ago and ironically gained the exact right amount as the nurses wanted. I ate very healthy during pregnancy and also very healthy now. So I’m not sure what I’m doing wrong?

Ive also been exclusively breastfeeding and I definitely feel hungrier but I just want to listen to my body and fuel it without trying to cut down.

I’ve tried gluten free but was constantly hungry. I like the idea of vegan food but I don’t want to cut out food groups for fear of getting a deficiency.

I have to stay away from meal plans / calorie counting / frequent focus on actual KGs and weigh ins as it’s triggering for eating disorder behaviour. what works is more of an intuitive eating approach for me.

I simply want this: to find a way of eating that makes my body AND mind happy, keeps me in the normal BMI, keeps me energetic, healthy, and makes me like my body, for life. Can this ever be achieved?

Can anyone recommend something? Has anyone been in a similar position? What has helped?

thank you!

I’m similar. Struggle with focusing on eating healthy for weight as I’ve been at the point where every food is just seen as a calorie. Lost my period and decided I couldn’t live like it anymore. Since then I’ve gained a stone in weight but I don’t want to gain anymore but also don’t want to restrict myself. It’s a hard one.

maybe adding an exercise plan would help?

You're a healthy weight. You may have a BMI of 25 but you are just at the other end of the healthy scale from where you were. Are you still breast feeding? I've read lots of threads where women have posted that when they stopped breastfeeding they lost weight whereas when they were breastfeeding they couldn't seem to lose weight. Concentrate on health and being healthy instead of fixating on the scales.

Have you heard of set point theory? It is a theory that your body has a biologically predetermined weight range where it is happiest and where your body is functioning at its best and it is achieved by 'normal' eating ie mostly listening to hunger signals (mental and physical) and not calorie counting. It is possible that you were below your set point during your years of calorie counting (artificially controlling your weight) and now you are eating more intuitively your body has settled where it's happiest. I would recommend reading up on it. Good luck!

Thank you everyone for all your messages!

That is so interesting about the set point theory. I do wonder what my natural weight is...I actually have no clue!

Yes, I also did some reading on BF and weight, and it doesn't seem as straightforward as they say - it does appear that some people don't lose weight until they stop. It definitely makes you much hungrier. I guess I'll just have to wait and see.

I'm focusing right now on eating more healthy (especially low saturated fat) but without restricting quantity and just focusing on filling up on healthy foods. Introduced daily walks with the pram too.

It's such a tricky balance isn't it...