Fear of being judged for the past

[Butterfliess]

Hi everyone,

I’m not sure if I am posting this in the right section but hopefully I will get some support and answers.

A bit of background, I recently married and both myself and my partner desperately want to begin our journey starting a family, hopefully next year some time.
I however am very concerned, I suffered greatly with an eating disorder into my early 20s. I fought hard for my recovery for many reasons, one of which was to be able to have children. I’m now 29, and although it’s been a difficult journey am super proud to be at this point. I do suffer with anxiety at times, mainly overthinking and worrying which I get support and help for my anxiety through private therapy. I will always reach out when I need to as I have learnt this over the years.
My fear is that as soon as I become pregnant, my midwife will jump on my mental health and this will or could result in a social services referral. This frightens me a lot, im very aware of my past, However I know this will not stop me being an amazing mom, it’s something I have always wanted. I don’t want to be judged because I struggled, the thought of it scares me so much that it’s holding us back from living and moving forward.
Will my mental health past and the fact I struggle with anxiety be a reason for the midwife to question my ability? I read so many horror stories and it’s awful.
My therapist agrees that I’m capable of being a great mum, she’s behind me all the way. I just hear so much of midwives jumping on you soon as you say your past struggles. Also if you have any form of mental health at present.
Can anyone offer advice? I would really appreciate. ☺️

Bumping for you x

They won't at all. Especially not if you already have a therapist and support network. They will ask you about this and have a note on your record to look out for signs of decreasing mental health so you can get help sooner. It will all be to help you and baby, not to judge or try to take over.

One thing to note, when pregnant your hormones will more than likely make your anxiety worse and can massively impact your mental health without you realising, so make sure you and your partner can have open discussions and that you can recognise these cues when distressed that you aren't acting/reacting normally. It'll really help with getting through the pregnancy and after in one piece and bring you closer too :)

Wish you all the luck in the future!

@MzMaria

Thankyou for your reply, I have thought a lot about how pregnancy will impact my mental
Health. I'm aware how much hormones can play apart in it let alone when your pregnant. I will be sure to keep Myself connected to my partner and support network.
I'm pleased to hear that you also don't think my past eating disorder and mental health will bring complications that I was first worried about, of course it's been such a long journey to recovery and I'm so pleased to be at this point. Being a mum in something I have always wanted to and I don't want to let my fear of being judged hold me back.

Thank you again