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Beating Binge Eating Disorder (BED) one day at a time..

8 replies

PenguinErector · 16/11/2020 09:10

Just posting for myself really but would love others to join in and share their stories of recovery too! Just need somewhere to talk through the ups and down :)

I'm in my early 30's and have always had a disfunctional relationship with food, looking back I assume it stems from a Mum who put so much emphasis on weight and still obsesses about it to this day. As a result I've been overweight pretty much my whole life. I've tried several "diets" and lost 7st with Slimming World but when I hit my target and was given wider scope I couldn't reign it in and regained 3 of those. It taught me nothing about controlling my eating habits and led to an unhealthy obsession with good and bad foods which wasn't very useful!

So here I am, a few years down the line feeling embarrassed because I "failed" but when I started reading more and trying to understand my feelings around it - it's pretty clear I have BED with bullemic episodes.

I'm trying not to focus on my size (which is making me miserable) because I need to sort the mental side or I'll forever be stuck in a cycle of back and forth which I don't want.

Sorry for banging on, I just needed to get it out there. Say it "out loud" I guess.

I've started journaling and am following the 5 steps as a starting point. I need to do this now, for my kids and myself.

I'm with that effort!
I can beat this!
I WILL beat this!

OP posts:
yellowbeaker · 23/11/2020 18:08

Hi @PenguinErector.

I have the same problem. I binge eat really badly and sometimes make myself sick afterwards due to the shame. I've literally just binged and I am so cross with myself. My DP kind of knows about it.......he has mentioned on may occasions how much I eat at times. He asked me if I make myself sick on purpose afterwards and I shrugged it off but he knows me too well.

What is the 5 steps you talk of?

FluffySocks75 · 29/11/2020 22:39

Hello. I came on here to start a similar thread. I've really been struggling recently and the weight is going up as a result which just makes me feel even more crap!

Cait73 · 09/12/2020 12:44

I hear you all; I lost 4 stone with SW it's taken 2 years (and lockdown) but I've put most of it back on

I eat even though I'm full, I don't need the food, I'm not hungry, my clothes are tight I feel bloated and uncomfortable but I still get up to go and get more food

Why do we do it and how can we stop??

dilly123 · 13/12/2020 18:03

I am a binge eater usually when down or stressed but sometimes I'm fine in myself but the urge still creeps up on me.. it's like a daily battle with that voice in my head that's says.. "go on it will cheer you up", "you've had a tough day, you deserve it", "you're 46 & single what does it matter how fat you get".. I'd love to equip myself with that switch off point where you just have a little treat & stop.. I've been actively really good for 13 days because I had gone up into the next stone bracket & wanted to reign it in.. I did as low carb as poss & lost 6lb in the 1st week.. no urge to binge but just today I don't know why... boredom maybe I feel that urge.. I tried to test the little treat theory & had a biscuit (homemade no idea of calories) but it just sets me off .. now had 3 & desperately fighting..

I recently opened up to my mum about my relationship with food & how for me it's like a form of self harm like cutting.. She's very much the can have one square of chocolate as a treat & leave the rest.. I said I can't do that the compulsion to eat it all & then more & more is too great.. but then the feeling of self hatred is all consuming & that in itself triggers me to eat more.. I don't think she understood at all.. she's my mum she sees her beautiful daughter.. I look in the mirror & see a fat ugly woman no man wants..

I want to be free of this cycle of all or nothing.. I can be very disciplined but only for a short space of time.. I just want to be normal even if I don't manage to lose weight & stay like this.. It will be better than this constant battle.

I'd love someone to say they are like this & understand as I can't talk to friends about it I'm too ashamed

choccybuttonshelpeverything · 30/12/2020 20:48

@dilly123 I understand. Jees just look at my Mumsnet name 🙄 I get it. Totally 😭

Purpl · 16/01/2021 17:21

Getting worse in lockdown. Have any of you made any progress ? Any tips ?

Harmarsuperstar · 16/01/2021 17:28

brainoverbinge.com/brain-over-binge-free-pdf/

I've found this book very useful. There's a free pdf too. It addresses BED and bulimia

Lazyi · 27/01/2021 19:28

www.credo-oxford.com/5.1.html

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