Breastfeeding with ED

[LadybirdJane]

Please please be kind, I'm really struggling with the guilt.

My baby is 9 months old and I've breastfeed with no real issues. I had issues with food for years but in the last two months I've lost two stone and been restricting my diet to 400-600 calories a day. I feel it is the only thing I can control right now. No one has noticed and my BMI is still within normal range, I can't seem to stop

I'm.sure my milk is drying up. Baby seems much fussier and I feel awful and that I'm starving him. He has 3 lots of solids a day but is still very much attached to the breast.

I don't even know what I'm looking for here but I can't talk to DP or anyone else.

Are you not really really hungry eating so little while breastfeeding? Baby will be fine regardless, but you cannot be well like this. Could you not eat more? Would that just not be possible for you right now?
I suffered from anorexia when younger, but luckily I no longer starve myself. I was constantly hungry while breastfeeding my two, and my weight stayed low because breastfeeding uses lots of energy.
Would knowing you won't gain weight even if you eat more help? I know it's a control thing above everything. You need to stay healthy for your baby though. Is there noone you can go to for help?

I know it's hard but please start eating or switch to formula!

With DC1 I went on a restrictive diet and had to sort it out to continue feeding

With DC2 I couldn't help but restrict my eating and couldn't produce enough milk

It's no good for you or baby, but you know that already. I know it's hard, but please think of your baby and know you need the energy to look after them whether or not you're producing milk X