I hate food

[Gerbil17]

Its a lifelong issue i have had.
I dont eat much at all. I get the urge for a specific food and i will go for that.
If i cant have that then i will not eat.

I just fancied a specific thing, went to make it to realise its gone. Now im not going to eat anything. There is nothing else i fancy/like.

It is so frustrating because i am hungry! It just feels when i finally am eating i feel i am getting better but then stupid things like this happen and i realise im not!

Today i have had 2 twirls and a packet of hula hoops.

I fancied a sandwich the other day. Went around every different sandwich shop possible. There was at least 6 of them. Not one had the sandwich i wanted.
Nothing else was even the tiniest bit appealing to me so instead of opting for anything else, i restrict.

Why do i do this?

I'm sorry you're going for this. Have you tried counselling?

Is there one basic thing you like, like toast, bread and butter or cereal, that when you don't really fancy anything complex, you could eat this for a meal?

I have been in and out of counselling for years.
Some days i can be great. Other days its terrible.

Im not keen on cereals or toast. Id been eating cheese on toast but theres no cheese left. I am just so awkward.

It is so frustrating and i know how stupid it can look to outsiders. "Well if you are hungry then eat that" yes if i could i would. My mind goes to restrict rather than finding alternatives if ive got none of the options available in my mind.