Diary of eating from counsellor making it worse?!

[Passthebiscuitspls]

Hi,
I've been referred through my GP to the eating disorder team in my locality. I had my first appointment this week and the counsellor asked me to fill in a diary of everything that I eat and drink for the next 7 days. I've been doing it but I'm finding it's making me so much worse! Has anyone else experienced this?
My weight has dropped quite dramatically this week and I'm sure it's this diary. I just don't want to see much on the paper.
Will this get easier? X

Hi, did you get it from a proper counsellor or some sort of wellbeing triage person? I just ask as it varies who you see some use the diary to assess. It might get better but it might not. You could stop for now and discuss with them at your next appointment- is it soon?

Well done for seeking help. It's so hard and counselling can be hard and can certainly feel worse before better as you start facing feelings etc you've pushed away but I don't know whether loosing weight faster is normal. Do they assume you'll eat more because you're shocked by how little it is as that sounds a faulty theory - you know how little you eat.

Anyway good luck! I didn't want to read and run.

I was also asked to do this and it did not help me in the slightest! Made me more conscious of my intake, I stopped after a few days

We avoided pretty much all talk of food in my ED treatment as it's so triggering for me. If it's not helping please stop and ask to see their dietitian for a more holistic approach to eating. I had a list of portions of carbs/veg/fruit/dairy/protein and used them as building blocks for meals instead of keeping a food diary. It was much easier.

Sorry - to add yes it will get easier. Eventually it'll only occupy a small corner of your mind. Right now that seems impossible but you'll get there.

Hi, I did this. It did make me worse but found that it did no harm for my team to see how bad it could really be. In fact it made it possible for them to be the only people who ever saw how bad it could be.

I am recovered now although I had a bad relapse recently due to very extreme stress. I kept a food diary all through my last treatment and found that therapy was more effective with bare bones honesty although I found it hard and triggering. During the last relapse I discovered that I was more aware my eating patterns were disordered and better at catching myself and implementing coping strategies . This was, in part, due to journaling my intake.

You can get through this...really. xx

I was given a sheet where I was asked to tick whether I'd had each meal/snack : breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner, snack, not what I'd eaten.
I did it for 2 weeks and it was useful to see how chaotic things are and where my flash points and triggers are. I do want to get better so I was as honest as I could be, even though it was a case of handing over the sheet and then not being able to answer questions she asked. She didn't ask me to keep it up - I think the task itself rather than the responses give the nurse the info they need.

Thanks everyone. It's really useful to know lots of you found it hard too.
TheNoseyProject it is the actual counsellor as I see her every week now for the foreseeable.

It seems a million miles away to be 'normal' and the first steps seem to be making me worse but I'm trying to trust her approach.

Fingers crossed it gets easier! X

I have to fill in those sheets too. I am an outpatient at an NHS ed clinic. I find it incredibly triggering and it makes me feel guilty if I have logged food and not put anything in the purge/exercise coloumn. I feel like it increases my purging behaviour. My nurse did ask if I find it helpful filling them out, but I struggle to voice what ive eaten to her too so at least the sheets help with that.
Maybe just tell her how much worse they make you feel seeing all that food. She might stop you using them.

Annonym mine doesn't have an exercise column, I wish it did!