Has anyone donated embryos?

[DCMummyLondon]

I’m hoping to be in the very fortunate position, after giving birth this autumn, of having four genetically tested embryos to donate. I’d be interested to hear from anyone who has done this about potential implications, etc.

Bump!

No but we may be in a similar situation! We are due our second in October and have 6 other embryos frozen that we won’t want to use. Would also be interested to hear of others experiences!

I havent donated embryos, but my DD is from a donated embryo, so I could not be more grateful to the people who do donate their surplus embryos so that people like me can have a go!

Thank you both!

You should think about the children involved rather than the adults. How would your children feel knowing their full genetic siblings would be out there somewhere? How would the children donated grow up feeling, knowing their full biological siblings and family are one unit yet they were excluded from that? I also think you need to ask yourself whether you’d give your children up for adoption as that’s essentially what embryo donation is.

I’m in a similar situation. Realistically, I can’t have another child for financial and practical reasons. Also, I’m pushing 43 which feels a bit too old (for me personally).

But I have three frozen blastocysts and I’d like them to have a chance of life, if possible.

@ASGIRC , if you’re happy to share, I’d be interested in reading about how you adopted your embryo(s).

I’m not in this situation but can also imagine that these frozen embryos feel like children already and the hope to set them free in a way.
The only way I think you could do this though is that if you say you’re happy to be contacted once they’re 18 like adopted children can be.
have you ever watched “long long fanilies”? I think that the bonds run very deep

@ASGIRC how ignorant! Are you donor conceived? YOU should butt the hell out as you clearly lack the comprehension of the complex feelings that come with being donor conceived. What a disgrace. This adds another great example that you have no idea who ends up with embryos and who ends up raising the child, some people shouldn’t be parents.

the people whose opinions should be listened to are those who have been created in this manner? Who the hell are you to dismiss opinions of donor conceived people?

We are in a similar situation. We have two children now and probably want no more, one at most. We have over 10 embryos frozen, half of which are also genetically tested. I have incredibly complex and mixed feelings about it. Ultimately I think I couldn’t donate then without being able to meet the recipients and understand the family on which the children would be raised, but I know that wouldn’t be allowed, so i don’t think we will be able to do it. But not totally sure yet.

I know people who have donated sperm as a way to make more money.. do you think all those children are longing for "daddy"?

Yes, great numbers of them are. They have a deep primal wound which affects many of them for the rest of their lives, there's lots of research and even interviews with people that you can read. Who are you to dismiss them so mockingly and to be so rude and angry at the poster who raised objections?

Your opinion that genetics is nothing is just an opinion, and a pretty naive one at that, and one which is being disputed more and more with each passing year.

I don't agree that embryo donation is the same as giving your children up for adoption. I don't think that embryos which are not yet foetuses are the same as children who have started to know you and call you mummy/ daddy etc.

However, I do think you have to consider how the children born as a result of embryo donation would feel, especially if you have your own family.

Would the child know that there is a biological family unit out there somewhere, which they are not part of?

If so, I think that would be extremely difficult.

I would not donate embryos for this reason, and I would also want to limit the risk of my child meeting someone who they are related to - they already have enough potential donor siblings and frankly I don't want to knowingly add to that.

What an unpleasant post. You don't know anything about @ASGIRC or their child or how they feel about it.

Edit: I just saw one of @ASGIRC 's posts had been deleted and don't know what it said - I thought your response was based on the original post which just says she has a DD from embryo donation. Ignore me!

I'm late to the party but am also the mother of a child through embryo adoption, after great soul searching, consideration and also talking to another couple who had gone down the same route years ago. We were offered standard IVF (with low prospects of success) but felt drawn towards giving a chance to an embryo that already existed. We are being open with our child, wider family and close friends about their background and seeking advice on how best to support our child with this as their understanding grows. We recognise that there are real complexities and challenges for us all to navigate and we see many parallels with traditional adoption, but we're beyond grateful that our child is here and brings so much joy. We will certainly support them to make contact with their genetic family when they can. We are thankful every day for our child and the couple who indirectly helped us experience the privilege of being parents.

I egg shared over a decade ago to fund a round of IVF having exhausted all other financial options. I know that as a result three children were born to two different families. They’re not my children, someone else grew them and gave birth to them but if they’re interested in finding me later on then that is absolutely fine and I will endeavour to answer any questions or fill any gaps that they need me to. I was able to write them a letter explaining why I had donated and in it I thanked their parents for paying for my treatment because we all so desperately wanted children. My own children know and have done since they were little but haven’t really asked any questions yet (this may change as they get older).

Hiya, thankfully we have been in your situation and donated our two remaining embryos last year. Today we found out that our first embryo donation has turned into a little boy. Very mixed bag of emotions to be honest but we are so happy we have done it.

@MammyHunter , may I ask how you donated them? Do you know who your recipient is?