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Donor conception

For anyone with experience of sperm or egg donation to share support and advice. Please remember this board isn’t for debate about donor conception.

Sperm donor experiences and info

3 replies

Holly0095 · 18/09/2018 01:30

Hi everyone, I hope I won't be judged by this technically it's my choice so it's not really up for debate but I do feel that I will have a few opinions pushed onto me to.

I was just curious when people have used a spear donor outside of a clinic what to expect, I'm looking at ai (artificial insemination), or possible ni (natural insemination) I'd prefer ni but the boy that deters me is my donor is older and o don't feel sexually attracted to him, I no that's not the point but if we are bumping bones then I'd like a little bit more then just a lying in bed severely awkward experience. Does that make any sense?
What can I expect from a donor I don't no if I literally is just a case of doing the deed and off again or if it's a bit of getting to no you doing the deed etc and then going from there? Sorry if I'm rambling I just wanted maybe a few examples of what to expect, I don't want to be take for a ride (no pun Intended) thanks lady's xx

OP posts:
MrsRubyMonday · 18/09/2018 02:14

NI doesn't have any benefit over AI for a donor conception, there is the idea that the female orgasm helps draw the sperm in deeper but you can do that yourself after he's gone. You can put the sperm in exactly the same place with a syringe as he can with his penis, and as long as it's fresh there's no difference. NI with an unfamiliar donor puts you at risk of STIs, it's really not worth it in my personal opinion.

Persipan · 18/09/2018 06:21

Do bear in mind, if you aren't already aware of this, that the donor would legally be considered the father of any child conceived in this way rather than via a clinic, and could assert this later.

I recently read a deeply disturbing account of sexual assault by someone who had (reluctantly) agreed to NI rather than a straightforward donation from the guy. I would be very, very wary of going down that route with someone you don't know and trust.

EnglishIrishRose · 22/09/2018 15:59

There is absolutely no benefit or advantage to 'natural' insemination. Artificial insemination works exactly the same way as a PP said. If you're single, your donor could challenge for contact and parental rights in court. But he would be a lot more successful if you did NI as that isn't a usual donor arrangement and implies a sexual relationship.
For my part (currently 25 wks pregnant) AI worked first time at home. I tracked ovulation to make sure I had the right days to get pregnant, had a relaxing environment in my bed with candles, spa music and had an orgasm after insemination. Legs in the air for a while and it worked very well.
You just need to keep the sperm warm in whatever pot or receptacle he donates into, next to your skin is best. Transfer to the syringe, slowly insert and stay relaxed.
That's my advice, but I understand that not everyone will get pregnant as quickly as me! It might take a few cycles, up to a year, and you really need to figure out what you're most comfortable with in that case.

P.S. I genuinely wouldn't trust the intentions of any man who wants to have sex with you to donate sperm. Always rings alarm bells for me.

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