My DS is a teenager. He has lived with me since his dad left over a decade ago and has stayed with his dad every other weekend ever since.
I'm not going to include too much detail as I don't want to be outing.
Recently, my ex announced that he is moving around 4 hours away. Despite moving further away, he has now said that because of this move he will be able to have DS more. He has asked for what he describes as a 50/50 arrangement, which would mean keeping the current every-other-weekend pattern and adding all school holidays.
My instinct is that this simply isn't practical at DS's age, especially with such a long journey. I'm worried it would leave him exhausted and stressed, particularly during such an important stage of his education. It would also impact the activities, friends and wider family he currently has locally.
We've never been through solicitors or court before bur I'm worried this may end up going down the legal route, which is completely new to me.
Would a court seriously consider ordering an arrangement like this? Do they mostly base decisions on the wishes of the child at this age? I would be happy to facilitate extra time during the holidays where it works for DS, but what is being proposed feels like a lot, particularly as the expectation would be for DS to do the journey himself by public transport. I can't imagine facing this amount of travel myself, let alone as a child.
I'd really appreciate hearing from anyone with experience of similar situations where parents live more than a couple of hours apart and what has worked.