I'm in need of some advice or just a sounding board, me and my wife have a 4 year old child, we are going through some serious struggles at the minute, we have grown apart and basically just are roommate's who co-parent, we haven't been intimate in years and we don't know if we will ever bring it back, we both seem to resent each other for numerous different reasons mine is down to I don't find her attractive anymore in a way of her lifestyle choices specifically, since my child has been born I've made an effort to get healthier to be a role model, I've lost weight and concentrate on my health, whilst my wife has gone the other way and just eats what she wants, puts weight on and doesn't care, now I know this is down to the fact she doesn't think I'm emotionally there for her, she doesn't feel supported and says I'm lazy around the house, these are just the things on the top of the iceberg it goes a lot deeper with it really, but we have said we are going to try marriage counselling, she explicitly said it might not work, and she can't feel attracted to me until she feels emotionally safe, and ive said I can't help the way I see you, I'm simply not physically attracted to you at this point in my life anymore, my fear of this goes mainly into not seeing my child everyday, it's what I've done for 4 years and the thought of it makes me cry on a daily basis, the missing out on the simple things of sitting with him on the sofa every morning eating breakfast, now I know I'd obviously see him, but it's the fact it wouldn't be everyday that hurts, I grew up in a broken home, I resented my dad, I always said this would never happen for my child and now it seems to be, it feels like I've basically had a kid with my best friend, we still care about each other deeply but we are not in love anymore, people would say these are trivial things, but family holidays, Christmases and simple days out would be no more as a family unit and it is affecting both of our mental health