Can I delay equity sharing of house sale until youngest leaves?

[eewwdavid]

Just wondering if this would be even remotely possible...I am in family home with teen dc and one just started uni so living away but home in the hols.
Ex moved out after an affair. He is quite reasonably not wanting to pay half the mortgage for much longer and pushing for house sale.
I'd love not to disrupt dc during exam years...but can't afford current mortgage on my own.
I have the offer of some money from my parents, which could allow me to remortgage on a smaller and hopefully affordable amount.
Clearly he is still entitled to his share of the house sale, but he has said he'd potentially consider waiting max 3 years for this if we could make it water tight legally.
Does anyone have experience of this?
I have no desire to stay here other than for DC schooling and stability so no issue with selling when the time comes.
I'm confused tho as to whether me then being the sole mortgage holder would mean his name being removed from the deeds?

Most lenders will want all owners to be named on the mortgage. He doesn't have to physically pay it but he would be liable for it in the same way you would be. Some specialist lenders will do "Joint owners, sole mortgage" - I would speak to a broker about this.

A few things to think about - how do you work out the equity split?

I assume it would currently be 50/50?

You inject X amount - how does that impact the % split? Ideally you need a valuation to work this out - EA valuations aren't necessarily that accurate but you could agree to get 3 and take the average, for example? It might be better to get a surveyor to give a more accurate valuation but that costs money. What are the sums involved here roughly? If the house is worth 300k you might take a different approach to if it is worth 2m IYSWIM.

Does he continue to get the uplift in value from this point until you sell on his % share even though you will be paying the mortgage? Ie. if he owns 40% of the property (after your additional injection of cash) then some of his 40% is mortgage and you will be paying the interest on all of it (his bit and your bit). You might want to deduct the interest you have paid on his share of the mortgage before you pay him the uplift.

Either way I'd speak to a mortgage broker about the mortgage issue and a lawyer about the way you manage this ownership, new equity, agreement on what you pay out in 3 years.

It's certainly possible but you need to get some professional legal advice.

If you take over the mortgage in your sole name instead of you and your DHs joint names, you need to agree what equity there currently is in the house, and how this should be split.

In a divorce in the UK, the starting point is 50:50, but this can change depending on the personal circumstances of each party (eg long marriage with children and SAHM, mum might get bigger % in lieu of maintenance).

However, you are only staying in the house to give stability/continuity to youngest DC.
There could be a recession and house prices could fall, so if you had agreed a £ amount to split, you would lose out .

I would suggest you agree a current valuation for the house, which would show x amount of equity, which would be split between you in y and z amounts.
But make provision that when the house is actually sold that the % split is applied to the actual £ equity realised IF THE VALUE HAS DECREASED.
If it has increased, the original agreed figures should be used because your sole mortgage payments have brought about that increase. Effectively he 'sold it' at that price, and should not benefit from any further increase.

It's not unusual for this scenario to happen, but you need to have a legal watertight agreement.

A close friend is in a similar situation, and it has caused her so many problems.

I think it's worth just selling the house, clean break, move on.

hed keep his name on the deeds as he still own his share of property

are you currently divorcing and going through financial settlement? If so you could agree a mesher order where the terms are agreed and durations along with outlining his retained share

he should retain the % even if house prices increase and op paying mortgage because his capital is tied up in the house and not available to invest elsewhere and op gets sole benefit. In Meshers it ms usual
that the party remaining takes on all mortgage while the other party retains their share intact, otherwise he’s due his capital now so he can invest.

and talk about cake and eat it / so his share is preserved if house depreciates but not if it increase !? No way would he agree to that and a judge wouldn’t insist on it

Thank you all...lots to chew over...
I had presumed that whatever % equity was agreed would be the sum at the time of the agreement...
This part is important to me as I'd be planning to reduce the mortgage asap afterwards.

We're def not talking a 2m house, but also it's an amount of equity which would help both of us buy a second place (very very roughly, £400k max value, £100k mortgage outstanding)

I wonder if i am over thinking how important the stability of the house is to DC?

I have seen on here that mersher orders are increasingly uncommon
A quick Google also says that he would remain legally bound to the mortgage, which doesn't give us a clean break.

I am heartbroken for my DC tho

Honestly, I think your DC will adapt. Divorce is so common these days, they probably have several friends who have moved house because of it.

Yes, it's very sad that you and they will not have the life you imagined and wanted. But it's how it is.

A clean break means everyone can have the same ending point, and start to move on.
It also avoids the potential arguing over valuations and equity figures, which could be very expensive re legal fees, and definitely in emotional energy.

Does he or you have pensions? You could potentially offset a share of his pension against equity.

It’s unusual to agree a fixed £ because you are getting benefit if their capital
invested so it’s fair they also get some capital appreciation on that as they can’t invest elsewhere, are restricted on ability to purchase another house etc.

Meshers do get awarded but can be messy, generally are a last resort if there’s no other alternative to house minor children and where parties agree. It is generally preferred to sell and purchase or for one to buy the others share out allowing both parties a clean break

children generally don’t care about houses. Just want stable lives with both parents in it

I put alot of emphasis on my house - turned out the kids didn’t care half as much as me

Thanks...I keep going round in circles on this one...for me personally I love the idea of starting again in a new place, even if it is much smaller.
And I don't like the idea of being linked to my ex for another 3 years.
It sounds possible, but complex i guess

The reality is for the kids, they wake up one day in one house and the next in another. Mine were excited. The house move isn’t as monumental as you think, kids do it all the time and don’t skip a beat. Being tied to your cheating ex and the Knock on effect will be worse, pull the plaster off and be done with it.

I’d just move, teens will adapt quickly as long as you’re not moving miles away.

Have you talked to a mortgage broker?

looked into a longer term with lower payments?

I’d be avoiding paying capital into it yet.