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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Should I leave him?

3 replies

justanothermother2023 · 28/03/2026 18:02

My husband and I have been having issues which got worse during pregnancy and I’ve been detached ever since. I’m the breadwinner and primary carer. He works long hours and I only see him on weekends. For years he has said he will be home more but this hasn’t happened. Our relationship has been so strained and I just stopped loving him.

The issue is I don’t want to leave him, not because I’ll miss him but I will miss the little support I get from him.

Being the breadwinner I also worry about my financial security for me and my child. My child will live with me because he won’t change his work to be school friendly.

I don’t know if it’s worth working on our relationship or if it’s time to separate. I don’t know if anyone else has been through the same but I have no one to turn to.

To be frank I feel so down about this. Yesterday after drop off I sat in the car and cried. I messaged me husband who messaged me to say he’s sorry I feel this way - no effort to call me or check up on me when I rarely message him when I’m upset. He then went out drinking with his friends and didn’t even bother calling me when I told I’m down before going out. To be fair he doesn’t go out with his friends much but acts like this just makes me feel so much more alone.

OP posts:
MayaPinion · 28/03/2026 21:15

Yes. It’s done - he clearly doesn’t care. If he did he’d have moved heaven and earth to make this right. He’d have come home to talk to you at the very least.

justanothermother2023 · 29/03/2026 10:58

MayaPinion · 28/03/2026 21:15

Yes. It’s done - he clearly doesn’t care. If he did he’d have moved heaven and earth to make this right. He’d have come home to talk to you at the very least.

Yes sounds like he is. When I questioned him he said it’s because I tell him how I feel in a rude way but truth is I’m just fed up of this behaviour. I don’t know how to mask it all and be nice…

OP posts:
PixellatedPixie · 29/03/2026 11:15

I think that seeing as you are married with a child together and it isn’t just a casual relationship, that you might owe it to yourself and your kid to try marriage counselling if possible? Even though you are sad and isolated and not understood by him, it is possibly fixable. How is he as a parent? Either way, as you have a child together, you will need to parent together for many years still and so counselling may help even if you do decide to divorce.

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