Emotional release after seperation

[Summersglow]

I've put this under this topic as didn't know where else it would sit. I am a mother to a 2.5 year old and have, in the last few months moved into our new home. I left an emotionally damaging and depressing relationship when my child was quite young. Due to the housing crisis/not being able to afford my own home I had to stay in my exes property longer than I would have liked to (he moved out temporarily.) Now, I have finally found peace and a home and am closer to family and friends and feel more in control of my life. My child is thriving and I feel grateful to be on my own two feet again.
However, very recently I have been overwhelmed with emotional outpourings of what I can only describe as a bit of sadness/relief/grief (have experienced all three individually unrelated) but I can only think it is because I am at a place now where I can fully release my old mental weight but I literally also can't believe how bad and how much of a struggle life used to feel before this chapter. It is coming up to two years since I had an awful bout of post-natal anxiety and although I'm co-parenting with the father as well as it can be, I just feel this sense of utter sadness. It's like I'm premenstrual, constantly. Is this what an emotional load/release feels like?
Any insight to others' experiences would be helpful.

Just saw this and didn’t want to read and run. It sounds like some of this may be to do with actual biology as your body previously got used to a state of chronic, high-stress survival and now you are in a new situation. Things like cortisol, dopamine, serotonin could be involved. For example, while in the relationship, you would have got used to your stress response system always producing high levels of cortisol and now you have to get used to less of it- a bit like withdrawing from a drug. I do think when I got out of a stressful marriage I felt flat as I had sort of got used to the chemical responses after being stressed and anxious.
Perhaps a good GP could help.

Maybe also put your post in general relationships or mental health where it may get more replies too?

Anyway I think it sounds entirely normal after what you have been through for your body to be having a bit of a relief sort of response. You say you are now near friends and family - are they good to talk to about it?

Hello, thanks for your reply. That makes a lot of sense. I am much more calmer and relaxed now and I do think some of the response is physiological. I almost see it as similar as stages of grief. Like going through one phase at a time. Maybe this is the final emotional hurdle. Fortunately I have a large support network on my doorstep now. Previously I was quite isolated as lived 45mins away and don't drive. The difference is huge, especially when raising a child. I think I'll continue to count my blessings and gently close the past somehow and rather than let this emotional surge overwhelm me I'll accept is as part of positive change.
I have lots of positive things to look forward to, including my driving test! Ha
Appreciate your wise advice. Thank you.

The driving test is brilliant, as once you pass that it reinforces a new chapter. Maybe you need other goals after that.
Perhaps planning holidays or short breaks (even a couple of nights in an Air BnB) does give a dopamine hit, apparently it is released in high amounts even when planning a trip, as well as when exploring new places. I remember taking my DD to Jersey when she was about three - just the two of us and it felt very liberating.

Thanks, yes got a few holiday plans in the pipeline so that is exciting. We've done a few trips with family and it is nice to realise you don't need a partner to have a family trip. Will defo look forward to holidays for just us too.
So glad you stopped by to comment. :)