Page 2 | Can my husband trade in the car before divorce settlement?

TopsyTurny · 2026-03-12T22:01:53+00:00

Hi everyone. I've just found out that my husband of 23 years wants a divorce. He doesn't like that I've put weight on and doesn't feel the same about me anymore. I actually said ok to him as I've been unhappy with him myself for a number of years. Just doing everything and cleaning up after him etc. For the last 12 months I've been taking care of my dad but he now wants me to get a job working full time to bring more money in. This coming from someone who only works 16hrs a week. We currently rent the property we live in so no issues there. I said I would move out as I really don't like this place and he said ok. The issue I'm having is that he wants to keep our car and I take any furniture I want which comes to about 1.5k . I caught him on the phone earlier today about trading the car in for a bigger one. Our car is currently worth about 6.5k which is more than any of our furniture. I don't see a solicitor until next week and googled it...it says he can't do that even if it's in his name as it's a matrimonial asset? He seems to think he can and is going to. We only got the car 3 years ago after he passed his test but says it's his as it's his name on the finance and V5. Can he really do that?

Original poster

TopsyTurny · 13/03/2026 22:40

ThatFlakyGuide · 13/03/2026 16:33

Your earning capacity will be taken into account in a divorce and parties are expected to maximise that unless there is a reason not too. It’s about achieving fairness rather than equality - if he is working 16 hours pw that is not enough to support another person so the money is going to have to come from somewhere. Is there a reason he is not working. FT? Assets are taken into account and people shouldn’t be looking to spend money to get rid of money.

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Both of my sons are grown up now, early 20s and both work full time. One is coming with me and the other staying with his dad who has already decided that his son is going to pay half of every bill for the house so that he himself can continue working less.

OP posts:

Becky19781978 · 13/03/2026 23:36

Sounds like your better getting the divorce quick .

is your dad leaving you anything , if he is , I would get the divorce and finance consent done quickly

millymollymoomoo · 14/03/2026 08:42

@MyMiniMetro that’s not strictly true

Sgreenpy · 14/03/2026 10:33

If you have no real assets - as in properties/savings. I think I'd just do the divorce myself and agree between you. It sounds like mostly you agree really. Don't get arguing over a £6k car make your divorce and financial agreement take a long time and cost you solicitors/extra court fees. Both of you want a divorce and clean break (your children are adults).
Solicitors will only cost you money.
The Gov.uk website shows you step by step how to apply.
Good luck OP
x

LemonTT · 14/03/2026 10:53

Sgreenpy · 14/03/2026 10:33

If you have no real assets - as in properties/savings. I think I'd just do the divorce myself and agree between you. It sounds like mostly you agree really. Don't get arguing over a £6k car make your divorce and financial agreement take a long time and cost you solicitors/extra court fees. Both of you want a divorce and clean break (your children are adults).
Solicitors will only cost you money.
The Gov.uk website shows you step by step how to apply.
Good luck OP
x

Agree. If car worth 6.5k but with financing and the furniture are the only assets then incurring legal fees to decide who gets what is a waste of money.

Assuming there are no pensions or other savings, ask him to show you the outstanding finance on the car to confirm how much value there really is. I suspect it is not a lot knowing how car financing works. He will just be in a perpetual cycle of debt refinancing for cars.

It’s really up to you how you decide to support yourself, work or don’t work. But if there is no wealth to share out and he doesn’t earn much you are on your own.

Noodles1234 · 14/03/2026 11:37

I believe he can BUT this will be included in any joint division, make sure your solicitor is aware and he needs to show you or your solicitor paperwork. I would be concerned he tries to strike a deal so underplays his hand.

Parentoffour · 14/03/2026 11:42

Not necessarily she can explain she has caring responsibilities, being a carer can be counted as a job.

LemonTT · 14/03/2026 12:07

Parentoffour · 14/03/2026 11:42

Not necessarily she can explain she has caring responsibilities, being a carer can be counted as a job.

To what end? Do you think getting 80% of the car value and corresponding finance debt means she can even fund her legal fees never mind an unemployed lifestyle. And in divorce, caring responsibilities are only relevant for dependent children.

TheCurious0range · 14/03/2026 12:22

If you've worked full time for 38 years do you have a good pension? If so agree to his proposal divorce and walk away

CelticSilver · 14/03/2026 13:04

TheCurious0range · 14/03/2026 12:22

If you've worked full time for 38 years do you have a good pension? If so agree to his proposal divorce and walk away

Until he finds out the pension is a marital asset.

millymollymoomoo · 14/03/2026 13:34

Op are there actually any assets here other than the car ?

pensions?
savings?
anything ?

1HappyTraveller · 14/03/2026 14:46

HappilyFreeNow · 13/03/2026 15:33

This is bad advice. The judge will exoect you to get a job. How on earth do you manage if only one of you is working 16 hours?

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Why is it bad advice?
why should OP burn themselves out to demonstrate that they can be both a FT carer AND work FT. All the while their lazy-ass husband makes demands on the OP to work FT but only works 16 hours/week himself with no caring responsibilities?
Who will look after OP’s father if OP works FT? If OP didn’t have caring responsibilities then I can understand your argument, but they do.

millymollymoomoo · 14/03/2026 15:49

But caring for her father would not be a factor in a settlement.

but as we’re also pointing out if there are no assets anyway ( which op hasn’t actually clarified yet) it makes no difference as there won’t be anything to split so working or not makes zero difference.

LemonTT · 14/03/2026 17:19

1HappyTraveller · 14/03/2026 14:46

Why is it bad advice?
why should OP burn themselves out to demonstrate that they can be both a FT carer AND work FT. All the while their lazy-ass husband makes demands on the OP to work FT but only works 16 hours/week himself with no caring responsibilities?
Who will look after OP’s father if OP works FT? If OP didn’t have caring responsibilities then I can understand your argument, but they do.

Edited

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The point is the OPs father’s needs are not the responsibility of her ex and wouldn’t be recognised in a divorce settlement. The OP can decide whether to work or be a FT carer. Her ex is telling her he isn’t going to resource her choice. Unless there are marital assets the OP hasn’t mentioned she is on her own financially.

It’s also a really bad idea to buy a car on finance in your own name in any divorce or in normal circumstances. It’s just a debt spiral the OPs ex is already in. The loan will always exceed the value of the car.

1HappyTraveller · 14/03/2026 17:22

LemonTT · 14/03/2026 17:19

The point is the OPs father’s needs are not the responsibility of her ex and wouldn’t be recognised in a divorce settlement. The OP can decide whether to work or be a FT carer. Her ex is telling her he isn’t going to resource her choice. Unless there are marital assets the OP hasn’t mentioned she is on her own financially.

It’s also a really bad idea to buy a car on finance in your own name in any divorce or in normal circumstances. It’s just a debt spiral the OPs ex is already in. The loan will always exceed the value of the car.

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Agree completely about the car. Dumb idea from the soon-to-be-ex.

Pryceosh1987 · 15/03/2026 00:09

Go to the gym together and work on each other together. Its a not good reason to get divorced. The support of marriage is something beautiful.

Reallyneedsaholiday · 15/03/2026 02:28

Get the car valued, and separate your finances asap, so you can prove whether or not you benefited from the car sale. Don’t get a full time before your divorce is finalised, because you could be liable for spousal support if you end up earning more than he does. Get an up to date statement for your pension to prove where it stands at the date of separation. It might be worth trading the car against keeping your pension, but be in a position to evidence all assets.

sellingrocks · 15/03/2026 05:50

You’ll be expected to work that’s just how it is - lots of people care for elderly and sick relatives and still work and you have two adult children who could presumably also assist

the car is legally his - yes he can sell it. It may be considered deprivation of assets but you say he was talking about trading it in for something bigger so that’s not deprivation of assets….

HappilyFreeNow · 15/03/2026 09:43

Reallyneedsaholiday · 15/03/2026 02:28

Get the car valued, and separate your finances asap, so you can prove whether or not you benefited from the car sale. Don’t get a full time before your divorce is finalised, because you could be liable for spousal support if you end up earning more than he does. Get an up to date statement for your pension to prove where it stands at the date of separation. It might be worth trading the car against keeping your pension, but be in a position to evidence all assets.

Judges won’t give spousal support in this situation they now go for clean break. Unless the OP is happy to live off the taxpayer she needs to get a job.

Reallyneedsaholiday · 15/03/2026 11:44

HappilyFreeNow · 15/03/2026 09:43

Judges won’t give spousal support in this situation they now go for clean break. Unless the OP is happy to live off the taxpayer she needs to get a job.

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Judges absolutely COULD give spousal support, in this situation. Clean breaks are suitable in SOME cases, but not all by any means.

Welshmonster · 15/03/2026 23:23

Let him have the car. He will need to pay the finance on it and insurance etc. if you get to keep your pension etc which is worth more. Also the kid will eventually move out

make sure you aren’t on the bills like utility and council tax etc. get it all switched to his name so once the divorce is settled then he can’t say you need to pay it.

sounds like he’s done you a favour by setting you free when you were unhappy. Good news is that you can get down the gym and get fit if you want to as you will have loads of time now you aren’t stuck with the man child.