Father of our children has a drug addiction (crack) for the past 10 years with periods of stopping and then relapse. He has not used for the past 5 / 6 months however we are now separating, likely to live separately from the summer. I don’t know how to proceed with child care arrangements - obviously want the children to see him, they have a good relationship with him when not using and he’s an involved parent when not using. However, I won’t have oversight of any signs of relapse which ordinarily I would see as we were living together, plus him being alone in evenings, etc is likely to take some getting used to/ may be a trigger.
I’d like him to continue to have contact with the kids, but to undertake regular drug tests (I don’t know who would do this as he’s not with any addiction services), to not drive them anywhere initially, but I don’t know if this is enough and what is reasonable to request. Do we agree this informally? Has anyone else been through this? I had planned to go via mediation as communication between us has been very challenging at times however he is now saying that we can agree it between ourselves and if we don’t agree, to use mediation. I just don’t know what to do.