Ive been with my current partner since 2016. We have 2 kids together (2 and 8). Up and down relationship. I was unfaithful about 5 years ago. The guilt I felt after knocked me for six (not looking for sympathy) I just knew i would never inflict that pain on her ever again. In retaliation she slept with her ex (twice). We agreed to try put this behind us. Fast forward to now and we have another child together. However recently ive found out she's been talking to the Ex again. No physical contact. She's said its because im not putting effort into the relationship etc.. my fault basically. Since then we feel like were on the right track somewhat but I keep getting these overwhelming feelings of anxiety and and loss of trust. Am I flogging a dead horse here. Everytime I feel like bringing it up for a bit of reassurance I get shut down. Ive never been in a relationship with anyone else so im doing everything in my mental power to convince myself to fight on.