Why did he think this was acceptable?

[FrostedBerries]

Ex and I split up 8 years ago. In that time he never once had the kids overnight, he'd only see them if it was at my house where he would come and visit, he would occasionally take them out but that was with prompts, and usually it was only to the local park and then he'd bring them straight home. He didn’t want to have them overnight or take them to his, so that meant for me never having a single day or night to myself which also meant zero life outside of being a mum. Why did he think this was acceptable? Just been thinking it over and can’t understand why a father wouldnt want to have their kids at their house or overnight and only wanting to visit them at the mums house? I was suppose to be ok with this and he couldn’t see what the problem was only coming down to visit and he told me loads of his friends only see the kids at the mums house.

My ex does this as well. Kids live with me 24/7. All the visits are at my house. The last time anyone visited his house was over 2 years ago and DD said there was a drawer with baby clothes. I have also seen a baby seat in his car on one of his visits which he had tried to hide in the boot. We think he has a secret second family. Could your ex have a similar secret?

Oh that’s sneaky! I don’t think he has a family but I have wondered if there is someone he is hiding them from.

Some men are just crap fathers and you really discover their true colours when you divorce them (although hen you look back, you can generally see the red flags). My ex had his allocation of the school holidays but used to work it so that if it was two weeks, say, he’d have one child for one week and then the other child for the next, so that he’d have them for his allotted time, but it meant that I’d never have any child-free time of my own and then he’d tell me that I needed to “get out more”. He didn’t have a secret second family, he just couldn’t be arsed to parent his to children at the same time.

Yeah I don’t think there’s a family but I could be wrong, he has put pictures of them up on his WhatsApp but I have wondered if he was hiding them. There’s so many men who say their ex stops them from having the children so it’s hard to understand why someone wouldnt want their kids overnight