So fed up

[constantnc]

Long story short i've been trying for 7 years to coparent with ex.
He dragged me through court for finances & custody, and has an EOW visit with the kids.

cms £425 month but only claimed for few months initially, once contact started with kids he keeps the money to use on them....he has pled poverty to anyone who will listen and neglected to buy stuff for kids. It just bought an easier life tbh.

For a year now he hasn't done his EOW, just a teatime here & there. He claims hes short of time, evergy & money. The ow & him have a child together.

Why shouldn't I claim cms? I know he will kick-off but honestly him not seeing the kids feels easier all round. I am thinking of giving him a months notice that he needs to start paying..

Opinions welcome!

Edit to say I am financially comfortable and don't need the money....but the kids could use it for clothes, school trips, saving for future.

Just claim

You will get the same grief, but get money through a month sooner.

Agree with PP. he’s had his chances, just put a claim through. Unless you want to delay the grief to keep things civil over Christmas when there will probably be more contact?

Aren’t we all short of time, energy and money? Poor baby that he is. I’d go to CMS and be clear his responsibility to his kids with you don’t stop because he’s fathered another.

My claim is still open with cms.
I feel morally I should give him 1 month notice so he needs to start paying in January. He will plead poverty but as the cms if up & running i could switch to collection if he doesnt pay in January.

No plans for him to see kids from 2 weeks ago till after xmas - hes busy apparently

Handhold needed.
I have given a month's notice to resume cms.
The reply was we need a conversation about that.
Um no thanks

Well done op

You should absolutely claim, if nothing else your DC can spend it on therapy to deal with having a father that let them down so badly.

I don't think you need a conversation with him. He needs to pay the CM & you're doing the right thing claiming via CMS.
What a whiny lazy shirker he sounds.

Yes he really is.