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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

A rant on expectations and trying to just push through

1 reply

TipsyAquaPoet · 28/11/2025 10:24

Hi everyone. I'm so nearly at the end of a messy divorce but I'm still waiting for him to sign the consent order.

I'm buying him out of the house. Initially he rejected the estate agent valuation so I got 3 more valuations to be certain the agreement was fair.

Then he kept asking the same question to my solicitor - why should he have to contribute towards the ERC on the mortgage? She explained it to him at least 3 times before finally accepting he had to contribute towards it.
I paid for the divorce application all independently and then also have paid my solicitor to draw up the consent order and everything without asking for anything from him.

When we separated he stole and broke several of my belongings, but when he left the house and left loads of his own things behind I packed and returned them all quickly and reasonably.

Now he's saying I need to pay for all of his costs involved in buying him out:
"Paragraph 12: Can it please be written in that any costs related to the transfer of the property are funded by your client, and that I won't be responsible for this? My solicitor assures me this is a very standard course of action in the case of being bought out of a home."

Obviously I'll agree to whatever just to be free from this man. I'm so desperate for that consent order to be done so I can be free.

Just wanted to rant and have a tantrum about how unfair it feels :(

OP posts:
Pixiedust1234 · 28/11/2025 11:20

It is very unfair but if your X was a reasonable and fair person you might not have divorced him. Forget the past, ignore the present, and look forward to the future.

What are you most looking forward to when it's finally over? I couldn't choose between a clean home, a tidy home, being able to access money or eating food that didn't cause me digestive problems (he insisted on cooking). All four things still make me ridiculously happy since he left.

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