Can anyone offer me any advice or reassurance, I'm feeling really low. I left DH 7 years ago, after being treated like crap for many years (no abuse). He always said he'd make sure the kids knew it was me that broke up the family. Now they are older (15 and 18) I feel that is happening, and I am struggling with how to navigate it.
I don't want to start telling them what a prick their dad was/is (obviously)! But I do feel I need to justify the split, more specifically than just 'some marriages don't work' 'it takes two'/general age appropriate stuff, which is what I've said until now.
I am sensing they blame me (and I know it is being fuelled by their dad), and I do feel guilty, I constantly feel I want to justify it to them, but I am mindful of not wanting to damage them further or make it worse.
I'm scared they judge me or will resent me, and will not understand until they are much older. DD (18) has autism and it is her I am particularly worried about as she is being manipulated by her dad and can't see it. How do I defend myself and still protect my DC from further upset? We have shared 50/50 care and I can't change this.