He doesn't love me anymore

[ilovemybabiessooomuch]

18 years and for past 5 he's been cheating with a smackhead lass, I say smackhead cos she takes heroin 🤮 I'm so hurt it's in fucking believable. It first started on New year's Eve 2020 and 3 weeks before we lost custody of our 7 children due to being late for school all time apparently that's neglect 🤷🏻‍♀️ anyway I've recently found out he's been going to cancer hospital to see her, (she told me she had cancer but lies about it and then less than a year later she got cancer 🤷🏻‍♀️ guessing karma worked it's magic eh 🤷🏻‍♀️ although I wouldn't with that on anybody, I'm just so angry and hurt because the evidence is there and he's twisting it back on me, saying if I want someone else go get em 😭😭😭 I really don't wanna be here anymore I've been to hell and back these past 5 years and I'm done with it. He's literally the only person in the worltive got and he's completely messed my head up 😭 I have no other choice, I can't see myself living without him 😭

I can't speak to him about it either because he still denied it all and and says Im fucked in head, but this dirty slag was even hiding I'm my house while I was there also he was always too poorly to go to contact to see our babies, so he put her first, I feel like I can't even breath anymore 😭😭

Sorry, back up - you’ve lost custody of your seven children, and you’re pining over this worthless cheating wanker?! I don’t wish to be unkind, but you need to get your priorities straight. It sounds like cutting all ties with this man and his dubious associates would be a very good start.

Well exactly...now op...tell us the whole story about why you lost custody?

Lost custody of 7 children?

Come on, no one loses custody for being late for school. You need to forget this idiot and concentrate on your life and that of your children.

Yes that's correct, also we didn't have a chance at getting them back because the social worker we had was a phycho path, literally. She was the one that was assesing us for them to return and I'd done everything the courts asked and lied on paper saying I hadn't done anything etc, she even went as far as running round my house threatening my children a week before she had them removed, they was petrified, also I've come to terms with the fact the kids now get everything I couldn't afford to give them tbh, if I took them back it would ruin there lives 🤷🏻‍♀️ I need to sort myself out before bringing them home, I'm not an idiot, I don't want them ending up like me, a mess with nothing and no1

Get rid of him, sort your own life out, then you’ll have 7 anazing people in your life, not just one useless piece of shit!

Well leave him and sort yourself out then. Or is it just easier to stay with him, blame him and everyone else for everything?
Sorry but you lost me on ‘I lost 7 kids because we were late for pick up’ and ‘the social worker was a psychopath’. Grow up.

Op your husband or partner is now in a relationship with a heroin addict...that is indicative of a chaotic life. I know no one on heroin. Social services really don't want to remove seven children from their home...why were they even called or made aware of you if all that happened was they were late for school?

I lost custody because I was always late for school runs, I was literally a single mum because he stayed in bed all day 🤷🏻‍♀️ it literally brokee that day, because I did my best, the house was always clean, they was always fed and they was always clean etc, they were my entire world and the day I lost them was the day I broke, I speak to them everyday and see them regularly and there always telling me about there holidays abroad etc so before I have them returned I need help togetyself straight and my head straight.

You lost your kids I can guarantee there's more reason than being late for school but hey blame everyone but yourself..Poor kids

But plenty of single mum's pick up their kids on time from school. You are in denial. What really was going on? No one loses their kids because they are late for pick up.

The school said I was 'lazy' I wasn't even aware I had ADHD until after they were removed and my solicitors said I should go back to court but the social worker who ran round my house like a phycho was still involved.and she told me not to bother as I'd NEVER get them back so don't even try or shed make my life a living hell 🤷🏻‍♀️

@ilovemybabiessooomuch you do not lose Custody of your children for turning up late at school… I bet Your no better than the new girlfriend

You seem to lack the ability to take responsibility for yourself, and that will have been a huge factor in the decision to remove the children. When you have seven children, your life basically revolves around getting them up, fed, dressed, school, homework, activities, bedtime. Most people would find it a challenge to provide a good standard of care for such a large number of children, and clearly you were not able to do so. Nobody has seven children removed purely because they struggled with the school run. There will have been other factors - and until you start engaging with the truth, prioritising your children over your love life and taking responsibility - rather than just insulting your social worker - you can’t effectively work towards having them home.

@sprigatitohas it spot on.

There are charities such as Pause and Family Lives who work with women whose children have been taken into care, who you’d benefit from contacting. Whilst most of their support will be aimed at helping you to work through the loss of your children, there will also be resources to support with relationship breakdown.

If your ex is in a relationship with somebody else and has suggested you also move on, you have to learn to live without him, however hard that is. It sounds as though his behaviour and your chaotic relationship and lifestyle will have been a significant factor in the decision to remove your children, so if there’s any opportunity remaining for you to be reunited, you have to break those ties with him.

Jesus this is depressing. Some people shouldn’t have any children, let alone seven! wtf is wrong with you?!

You don’t lose 7 children because they’re late to school, you lose 7 children because you’re neglectful, inadequate and didn’t look after them. Thankfully, they’re now receiving proper care.

Your poor kids. They deserved better than this shit show

Hopefully they are not returned and end up with a loving family who looks after them

Yikes talk about priorities in the wrong place. This can’t be real can it?!

I'm one of eight DC. I can tell you I was never late for school once, nor were SS ever involved in our lives. DM was up at 6.30am to make sure we were all where we needed to be.
You need to realise seven children was never an excuse for being crap, the book begins and stops with you. Until you take responsibility nothing will ever change.
Your DC might be having all their needs met now, but no child escapes trauma after removed from their birth parents. You can blame a 'psycho' social worker all you want. It doesn't make it true. SS should never have been involved in the first place.

This!!!! FFS!