Heartbreak after heartbreak

[Gretafamily]

My H asked for a divorce in January out of the blue and started dating someone straight away that he met in real life a few weeks beforehand. So I was heartbroken he asked for a divorce, heartbroken he got a new gf straight away, he moved in with her a couple of months later. However, we share a child so unfortunately I still have to see and speak to him.
Now, I’m heartbroken that his new gf is with my child. I’m jealous and I just want to hug my child and keep her with me. I was so sad that my H, new gf and DD went to a firework displace together as if they were family. Me and H were kind of getting on for DDs sake and I asked nicely if maybe the gf not go as it was upsetting me a lot. Not to ever do activities but slow things down. He said my happiness isn’t his problem.
How can I get over the pain of a potential stepmum? It seems I’m doing okay and then Bam! I get hit with another milestone or event.

He is a cock. How far along with the divorce are you? Step right back.

Divorce isn’t finalised yet so we split in Jan and started divorce proceedings in April I think.
I really should step back you’re right, it’s just difficult as my DD is only 6.

He is an utter asshole. Unfortunately that type of person only makes things worse, so your best bet is to show no interest or feelings. It is so so so hard, that sting in your heart and the cold sicky feeling.

Have you considered dating? Do you have a good friend group and support system? Just thinking if you know your DD is going to be out with them, it's best you're distracted as much as possible. Unfortunately it is just so shit and there's no avoiding it. Fake it till you make it is my only advice. Next time you speak to him, fake happiness, tell him you hope they all have a nice time etc. Keep contact to a minimum, give him nothing to use against you. It will get easier x

Yes, I have friends and good support system. I have considered dating so maybe I could think about that more. Thank you for the advice. It is so hard. I already struggled with DD not being here every night as he has her a couple of nights a week. I just feel like my heart was being ripped out and now he does
cosy family activities. You’re right though, I need to distract myself.

Let's hope he doesn't want your support anytime soon.

Look after yourself and your daughter. You two are the most important people in your life.

You don't have to see or speak to him.

You can both communicate by a parenting app when needed, and remove all other ways of contact.

In the future you can commence texts about child arrangements, but while you're still feeling like this, better just leave it to the app, bare minimum pick up times etc.

Can you get one of these parenting apps and have no other contact with him? Then you can get on with planning your new life. It's rough OP but you'll get through it.

Oh my god, I want to cry reading this. Horrible horrible situation. I’m so sorry…

Regardless of situation (amicable split to long term affair) - many people will go into a new relationship and kids are part of the package. Many people eventually blend families / move in. My sons mates mum (has been with someone 2 years and just move him and kids in with him, although the are mid to late teens).

Its going to happen, and unless your going to stay single till kids are 18 you will do the same. Maybe its happened too fast for you and even for some people on here. I moved forward quickly and partner was involved with kids, and same with my ex. Yes, I was upset when they do things that I would want to do but thats how it is.

But it is good for your Daughter to have time with her dad which is good for her.