Changing contact schedule.

[Illbefinejustbloodyfine]

Split 8 yrs ago when DC were babies. Ex has had dc one day a week every weekend since then. The past year has had overnights maybe once a month, and recently started doing 1 school pick up a week.

I don't feel that every weekend works well for the dc or either parent but ex is resistant to eow.

Dc often don't want to go, as we have busy weeks with school and work, so I frequently have 1 at home. I feel like eow would enable each parent to have a weekend "off" and the DC to have some downtime at home on my weekends. We never seem to have a "proper" weekend. We would be able to have a weekend away.

Ex would also be able to fit his hobby in more easily.

Contact schedule was set by Ex , but I have strongly encouraged the overnights.

On a more selfish note, id like to start living my own life a bit now the dc are older. I have been solely responsible for everything until very recently.

Im considering just changing it. I've made several suggestions over the years, all met with a no. Or at least, if I want to take them away for a weekend, just doing it. Is that unreasonable?

How old is your child? Once he’s 12ish, he’s considered legally capable of choosing how much contact he wants with each parent.

Yanbu to prefer EOW and if you took it to court with reasons like you want to take dc to spend time with your side of the family overnight then that would be seen as perfectly reasonable. Would he take you to court?

If there’s no court order then you could say “I’m taking dc away for the weekend” and there’s nothing he could do legally in time but there’s a risk of him messing with contact and not returning dc etc so tread carefully.

If you don’t have a court order just stop facilitating him having them every weekend and go away. He can take it to court but you can’t force him to have them at all let alone overnight.

No court order in place then yes, you can just go ahead and take then away but I would give notice so you are reasonable. However, it goes both ways, he could also just choose to keep them... not saying he would but always worth having the otherside in the back of your mind.

How old are your children now? Depending on their age they have a say in this too, and supporting then sharing their views in a good thing to teach and model.

perfectly reasonable for you to want your child EOW. Why should you only get the school time. Just tell him it’s changing as better for the DC and you want to spend downtime with your DC. Agree in not taking them, if he challenges you, stick to your guns.