Am I being unreasonable?

[Eyeball]

My dad died on 06/08/2025, I found him. I'm an only child so have had to sort his flat (a prolific hoarder) and affairs out.
My husband has been supportive ISH by helping with the large item removals, I handed his flat keys back on Thursday and feel lost, I have taken his phones and kept them on charge, for no particular reason, and today he told me to stop keeping his phones on charge and to let him go. My husband has always been jealous of anyone who has my attention, he was very pissy (pardon the language) when my dad was in hospital after having a lung operation to remove the cancer. He is also jealous of my mam ( I see her once/trice a day as she has agrophobia and vertigo) who he feels is taking my time away from him. Please can someone unbias tell me if I am being unreasonable to A) need more time to mourn my dad and B) to look after my mam as I am an only child. He is on the way to being soonto be ex-husband. Thanks for the ears xx

You should be able to take as much time as you want, there are no rules and they certainly shouldn't be dictated by your DH. What on earth does it matter that you occasionally check your DM's phone. I'm 2 years down the line and am still grieving my DM, we were very close.
As for you seeing your DM twice a day, it's totally understandable given her health.
Has he always been like this OP?

You are absolutely not being unreasonable. It's your husband who has the problem not you..Carry on with what you feel inside.

Not at all. You are doing the right things.

Your husband is being very selfish unsupportive and quite ridiculous.

Parental loss for an only child is huge. I should know. Take care of you.

You are not being unreasonable. He is too controlling and needs to support you, or fuck off. I’m so sorry for your loss.

Thank you for your kind words, love to anyone who has gone or is going through the loss of a parent.
He has always been a bit jealous looking back. Hindsight is a wonderful thing.

Hi all and thanks for all the comments, you are all a truly wonderful community. So tonight I have put my big girl pants on and told him I want a divorce, he tried to talk me round, but has FINALLY accepted it. While on a roll I have filed for divorce so it's real! Xx again thank you to all the mumsnetters who have reached out or shared their story, it makes us who are trying to take the next step, some motivation and some (dam menopause I have forgotten the word... ) validity that we can survive xx

Yanbu at all and need to take as much time as you need and I'm sorry for your loss. Goodness me, losing your most precious ones is heartbreaking and grief is overwhelming. There is no time limit, sometimes you never get over it. Xxx

Has he experienced trauma/grief? He needs to grow up and if he can't support you then take some time away. As for seeing your Mum, please do not let him ever dictate this, she needs you more than this baby man does. Xxx

I just checked ( in view of your post) and, 10 years after her death, I still cannot delete my Mums telephone number from my contact list.

you grieve how you grieve. No one has the right to tell you how that should be.

of course your husband is being selfish and unreasonable.