Well, That’s It

[SilverLinings123]

Well, that’s it.

Some of you may have seen my other posts, including on Dadsnet (yes, I’m a male). It’s been a sorry saga for the last few months but today my OH told me that’s curtains for us after twenty years, and that a divorce is happening.

Never thought this would be me. I’m devastated. Feels completely unreal, like a horrible, awful dream. Life was normal-ish when I got up this morning, and then it has been completely turned on its head.

OH is looking for a quick, amicable split (who says they want a slow, antagonistic one?). Just feels like she’s in a tearing hurry to erase our relationship and pretend I never existed.

Just needed to vent after a difficult, difficult day. Hoping this is as bad as it gets.

Sorry to hear that. Sounds like it was inevitable and you kinda knew it was coming. You should see this as a big release. Now you know. You give yourself time to get over it and move on to better things. Every cloud etc.
(p.s. I've been divorced 3 times) It's always worth it!

If there are children involved amicable is always better

amicable does not mean just bow down to her

Are you married ?

Yes we’re married

So educate yourself on divorce and financial settlement
understand the principles of fairness
understand what assets and debts there are
understsnd what proposals could look lik
try to discuss and negotiate amongst yourselves

amicable is always good but that doesn’t have to mean roll over for the sake of it

do you have children? What ages are they if so? What will arrangements looking if you do ?

dies she work, do you? What assets are there etc. see a solicitor to know your position

currently while emotions are high, aiming for civil rather than friendly etc. amicable can come, as can friendly, but currently it might not feel like it.

you’ll get through it though

As I’ve seen this coming I’ve been educating myself, getting solicitors lined up, and getting my head into the space of what might happen next.

But I’m struggling emotionally with the death of a long term relationship. Seeing the photos around the house, or popping up on Facebook is killing me. I honestly never thought this would be me. Even when this started a few months back my OH cut off all communication, made herself a stranger to me. It’s just so sad.