Guilty

[Horsewench]

Seperated from husband in April due to him being emotionally abusive. We still talk and get on better than when living together. 3 weeks ago he was admitted to hospital having a stroke and heart attack. He lives about 20 miles from me. He cannot use his left arm so is struggling to cope. Should I have him back? I know my grown up kids would say no. I feel guilty

No, if course you shouldn't have him back. If he needs care then he will have to arrange it. When you cut the ties, you cut them. Would he have rushed back if you had needed a nurse?

Absolutely not. You will ruin your life.

no. You’re a good person and that’s why you feel guilty. But equally, he is not your responsibility and will learn to cope. Remember all the reasons you split in the first place. Would going back be any better?

Nope. You're not his carer.

No.

My ex is not abusive, we still get on and will always help each other. But we still wouldn’t get back together. You can be supportive as friends (although with a history of abuse I wouldn’t).

Never go back, you left for a reason.

Never go back, this is not your problem.

Absolutely no. Once he figures out you are feeling guilty he will use it and abuse will escalate.
Don't let him use you. He has made his own bed.

No! I can understand the guilt, which is likely due to the way society/ patriarchy make women feel. You are a strong woman facing upto the unhappiness in your marriage and making sure you put yourself first at last. Let him sort himself out.

Your kids were there and can't they are saying no, so you need to listen to be them. Don't throw more of your life away.