Advice - Breakup

[CBX]

I broke up with my partner of 12 years 2 months ago due to him having a 2 year affair with two different woman he worked with all while i was grieving for my dad. we have a mortgage and a 5 year old. he has told me he needs to move back in because it is his house too. which i understand i cant stop him, but he has not financially supported me and my son he earns triple my wage as i work part time he has recently told me he doesn't have to pay me CSA if he moves in the house and that i cant get any help financially because i have a mortgage. so it involves me asking him for money and i do not want to have to ask him for anything. I am worrying its going to effect my son if he moves in. he has just adapted to it being the two of us. I know he thinks he has changed and he wants to show me but how can anyone come back from this!

I would just like some advice with this financially and what i should do next
i am worried about financially supporting me and my son and just doing everything on my own. and starting over again. my son has some additional needs so routine is very important to him and his school is at the end of the road he loves being there and i do not want to take him away from what he knows.

Do you have any family nearby op? Do you own the house together?

I do have family near by, yes its both of our house.

You can get Universal Credit and CSA (actually now called CMS) even if you are under the same roof and whether or not you have a mortgage. that is if you are genuinely separated ( sleeping in separate rooms, paying your own bills and having separate bank accounts.) e.g. Separated but living in the same property | CPAG

The elephant in the room is the joint ownership of the property. Do you want to keep living in the property? If so there are 2 ways to do this.

1. You buy him out of his share. Can you afford to do this?
2. You apply to live in the house as your residence. This option is not straightforward as you are not married. You will need to demonstrate this is the only housing option open to you. It’s very likely that you would need to take over the mortgage. Your exes interest / ownership will not change during the period you stay there even if you pay the mortgage. When it is sold you will have to give them their share.

You both need to accept that long term you won’t be living together or sharing expenses. The situation with the house needs to be resolved. You should really be agreeing long term Co parenting and child support arrangements. But you are going to have to deal with the jointly owned property.

I expect his threat to move in is solely to get you engaged with the need to deal with the house.

I would try and CMS and let them tell you he doesn’t have to pay anything. Sounds like he is just trying to scare you and make threats though to me him acting this way suggests he is the one who is scared of the money you might be able to claim off him and he’s really hoping you won’t find out and that you won’t get proper legal advice.

I have been told this from a couple of my friends recently I think I am best to call them and find out thank you 🙏