To say im confused with my thought process is an understatement....bit off a back story, 25 years, 2 teens. I asked for separation almost 2 years ago. We drifted apart, alcohol on my DH's part and generally, I felt so alone and felt I deserved more from my DH which always started off well but old patterns emerged. All communication through messages and I have had some corkers from him, putting the guilt in me everytime. Anything I have texted about how I felt in our marriage, he apologies. But I dont know if he really understands, how can you through text messages.....anyhow. lately he has been messaging, how he misses me and he messed up....its really playing with my mind, almost thinking could we even consider trying again, I havent asked him outright but I think thats what he wants....Do I? Honestly, 60% doesnt, but theres still that piece of me, that thinks, was it so bad, im so lonely and have teied numerous different things but i also keep coming back to thinking off him and missing him generally, the good bits.....Please throw some advice or just words of someone who gets my dilemma? Sorry this is such a rant I cant really articulate the whole story, it would go on for pages and pages. Thank you