Which size flat/house to buy??

[OITNB]

I’m planning to separate from my husband at the end of next year when my youngest finishes school. We’ve got 3 kids — they’ll be 23, 20 and 18 then. Eldest will be done with uni, the middle one is away at uni and the youngest will likely study away too.

My husband will probably keep the family home and buy me out, and I’ll get 50% of the house and super. I’m tossing up whether to rent for a bit or go straight into buying a 2–3 bed flat/house. I’m going to save some money for rent on the advice of a family lawyer when the balloon goes up.

Big question is about the kids — do I need to allow for them to have rooms with me if they’re mostly living away? Maybe the eldest would? Or just keep it small and simple? Can’t imagine any of them will want to live with their narc, controlling father.

Would love to hear what others have done in a similar spot. Thanks

OP, not only will at least one if not more of your DC return to live with you, I assume that you are hoping that eventually, they will have partners or spouses, and in the fullness of time, give you DGC. If you want them to come and visit, you need to have space. I’d recommend 3 bedrooms, so that you have one for the parents and one for any children, or the possibility of having two of your children to visit at once. And don’t fill the “spare” bedroom full of your clutter - always a temptation!

I wouldn't rent for long as it is so £££ (are you in Australia, I understand property prices in some areas are insane!)

I would def buy something big enough for at least 2 of your dcs to be home as they come and go these days, and have a sofa bed or twin room in case they are all home, so 3 bed minimum

I would buy if you can, but that will probably take time to sort so you might need to rent whilst you find something suitable. I despair at the amount I've put into rent in the last year since I separated but it's a means to an end.

I've only got two kids but my eldest is 19 and lives with his dad. I'd love to be able to afford to buy somewhere where he can occasionally stay but the cost of that just doesn't make it worthwhile, so I'm going for a two bed and a decent sofabed! Living on my own for the first time ever, I'm still getting my head around costs and what I can afford so am erring on the side of caution. No idea what's around the corner.

Mine were back for long holidays throughout Uni, and the time between leaving Uni and getting a job.

They also come back for Christmas, to see local friends, to see you..

I would make sure they all have at least a bed in a shared room.

And if possible I would go straight to buying.

You would find it hard to find a rental agreement for less than a year, I think, and it’s just do much money that is dead money. Invest in your future, move to a place that you can make yours and feel secure in.

Thank you everyone!

Personally I’d rent for a year. It will give you a chance to settle, to see what happens with your children’s lives, and puts you in a good position to be a cash buyer when you want to buy - plus houses prices are not rising, if anything they might fall a bit.

in a year or so you can decide what suits you best