.mortgage issues

[WorthyHelper]

Hi. My husband and i are separating. He usually pays 70% of it and i pay 30% of it proportional to our salaries. He earns 3x the amount I do but has always wanted me to pay 50% of it. Since we separated in April 2025 he hasn't been consistently paying me for all council tax and water bills that are in my name. The mortgage was originally coming out from his bank account and I would transfer my proportion to him but after talking to his solicitor he has taken the direct debit off his account and sent me an email to say I am fully liable for it and if I do not pay the mortgage I will have a poor credit file but the mortgage was in both our names. I cant afford to pay the mortgage on my own and I dont know what to do. Please can a your advise me further as I am stressed and scared. The only reason I wasnt giving the full 30% is because I was deducting the contributions that he didnt make and now he is saying thst I need to be paying 50% of the mortgage and he will put a standing order into my account. The house has been vacant and neither of us live there. I dont know what to do and the mortgage company just told me thst they want the mortgage in full every month. Does anyone have any advice please?

Why are neither of you living there? Leaving it empty is another problem.

yes if you co own you should pay half from the point you split. He has no reason or obligation to subside your contribution anymore. That assumes no children and child support obligations.

if the house is empty get the finances sorted asap.

sent me an email to say I am fully liable for it and if I do not pay the mortgage I will have a poor credit file

So will he if both of your names are on it. Why is nobody living there? Where are you both living?

I've tried to get him to consent to sell it with me or buy me out but he refuses ive tried since may to get him to sell and the agents say they need consent from both of us which he wont agree with. He doesn't want me living there as he ks financially abusive.

I rent a room from my mum and he moved bsck with his family

You need to move back in and apply to court for a sale.

Get the divorce started. Find your ANGER and take back control. If you have evidence that he's frustrating the sale, refusing to pay any contribution towards the upkeep/mortgage you could argue for a higher % of the proceeds as he's fucking your credit score as well as his own.

Get some legal advice asap. He can't stop you living there.

And check your home insurance. You likely aren't insured if it's empty.

Have you started the divorce process? And financial separation process? They are the key to this

im the meantime the mortgage needs paying … it’s joint and several so you either need to sit and agree who’s laying what, agree half each or failing that one will need to pay all of it. Not paying will lead to arrears and ultimately repossession ( and credit rating will be terrible)

no reason to not live there. Move in and stop paying rent ar your mums

speak to a solicitor about interim financial arrangements to ensure the mortgage is paid .

OP your situation is quite complex.

From what you have posted you and your ex have a joint mortgage. The lender requires one or both of you to pay it in full. They don’t care who and they won’t recognise any agreement you made between you. The mortgage agreement trumps that. If the mortgage is not paid in full you both default. That will create a bad credit marker for you both. Which will impact on any future borrowing from any type of lender. But expect mortgage applications to be declined.

From what you have posted and reading between the lines you are both messing around with each other over money and in doing so putting your credit worthiness at risk. The only way to stop it is to wind back your positions and pay your bills. You are both also breaching terms in your mortgage and insurance by not living there.

From what you have posted he stopped giving you a contribution towards some bills. Reading between the lines I assume he did this because you weren’t paying half the mortgage. And in retaliation you recovered this by not paying 30% of the mortgage. And you are now both in default and you are both going to have bad credit ratings until you both back down.

You cannot insist he pays 70% of everything now you are apart. When you were together he agreed to pay more than his share of the bills. He didn’t have to and he wasn’t obliged to. There is no legal mechanism you can use to compel him to fund 70% of the mortgage or anything else.

Most people would expect to pay 50% now you are separated. He subsidised you because you were together not because he has to. Now you have split you need to pay your share which is half. The fact that he earns more is neither here or there.

It is a simple principle you own half and you live in half and you benefit from half. It is only right you should pay half. Not being together means you cannot expect him to pay part of your half.

In the event that one of you lives on the house that party should pay the full mortgage because they are benefiting 100% from the asset.

Not paying the mortgage is a problem for both of you. Not living there is a problem for both of you. Problems you are creating equally for yourself and each other.

I can’t give him advice but you should offer to pay half of all the costs since you split if he agrees to pay the other half. Then you both need to agree the house should be occupied and that the person who occupies it should pay the mortgage.