Has anyone successfully deferred the sale of the house?

[Beachlovingirl]

Just wondering if anyone has been able to do this and how they went about it and if you were successful - or unsuccessful and why.

any experiences on this please!

background I do want to hold onto the house until youngest child is older mostly because buying out the other half means a massive mortgage payment.

thanks in advance!

You’re very unlikely to be able to do this unfortunately because to do so keeps you tied together financially, limits his borrowing capacity & ability to buy another house if he has to stay on your mortgage + doesn’t get his % of the equity for deposit.

Very rare in England now, they just prefer to award you a higher % of the equity to move on.

How would your ex house themselves if you were both stuck on the mortgage. I don't think thats very fair.

Genuine question - why do you think you should be able to? You keeping hold of the house until the ‘youngest child is older’ means your ex’s money is tied up in it until then. For most people, this would limit their housing options massively, preventing them from buying anything else in the interim because you are essentially holding their deposit money hostage. It can also impact affordability for renting somewhere.

thanks for replies everyone.

The mortgage is in my name and I pay the mortgage and all associated costs of the household myself. I also pay for all the children’s clothes and after school care, and everything really. He’s terrible with money and usually gets his pay check and it’s gone in a few days. He has terrible credit and so won’t get a mortgage himself (hence it being in my name - we tried joint mortgage and was turned down)

He is entitled to 50% of the equity of course and I can release but it’s not easy covering all the bills myself as it is. If I needed to re-mortgage to buy him out I think it will be too much.

I know I’m being selfish by trying to keep the house but the separation itself will be tough on the children never mind a move thrown in.

I would imagine that the only reasonable circumstances are stuff like your child is taking GCSEs or A-levels next summer so don’t want to sell until after exams.

It’s not usual to do that anymore. In a few years you still have the problem of having to give him 50% of the equity (50% of the equity in future not 50% of the equity today) and it’s not easy for adult children to move out because housing is expensive. If your children are very young then they will probably cope with moving much better.

First you need to understand if he’s entitled to 50% of equity. Have you had any legal
advice yet ?

@Snorlaxo well I’m just in a pickle. I can indeed just sell the house and give him the cash and be glad to be rid of that link and honestly this really appeals.

I thought it would be less impactful on the children if they didn’t have to accept the split and a new house.

sounds like I just need to accept this is the way it will be.

@millymollymoomoo no I haven’t had any legal advice yet but will be talking to someone next week but I was planning on being open to the 50% because my husband is a very angry man and I just was trying to avoid the consequences by saying fine with the 50%. The divorce is my idea as you can imagine.

You may find you are entitled to a larger share of the equity. I have seen even a 70/30 split in some circumstances. Definitely get legal advice pertinent to your specific set of circumstances.

Go through the divorce process and work out what share of the equity he is entitled to. If he's not the primary carer and is not planning to house the children then it could be he is entitled to less than 50%.

At that pont, work out if you can afford tho buy him out. If not, you will have to sell.

The judge in our divorce said I can stay in the house until youngest is 18. My ExH like yours is terrible with money and wouldn’t get a mortgage regardless. My solicitor said we could ask for it and see what happened. The judge didn’t even question it and approved the order within less than a week

Deferring a sale is not always a good outcome. Rather kicks the can down the road. Aside from remaining financially tied, it often means that when kids are 18 and you need to sell you are more limited in a mortgage due to age. It also means you need to give ex a share of that house value, including any house price appreciation. And of course downsizing them is not always desirable because few children leave home at 18.

of course there are some situations where it might be the only option, or a short term one if kids are say 16 and doing exams and don’t want disruption but it’s usually not a good longer term option for either party.