Difficult handovers

[Bandybroad]

I’ll try to be brief. Recently, after 10 years of marriage and relocating to a new country for former partner, he came home one night told me to suck his d*^%k twice, then proceeded to tell me I was empty, hated by everyone, my entire(yes entire life) was just moving from crap show to the next, etc
Id say we’ve had our brawls, but this was horrendous. Literally a week earlier he texted “love you”?!?
it’s been like 3 months and that and what’s followed has consumed literally every single waking second.
Within 24 hrs, he’d packed up and simply said we aren’t talking about anything.
He initially told me to get out, MIL convinced me to relinquish our flat. As I’m looking for a month, (he, his family, and our daughter went on holiday to Spain)I worked out explaining it to our daughter our new “special place” landlord calls and he’s taken himself off lease.
He then, through his mum (because he will NOT have any type of convo with me about our kid, the house, anything) says he’s transferring utilities as they’re in his name.
nope left them with me(£300 gas balance) didn’t tell me. Had already set up WiFi install, had to pay for what he hadnt transferred….on and on.
He then takes everything. My DD and I eat off the coffee table when she’s not at his.
i know it sounds nuts, but I still am reeling.
I didn’t cheat on him, I didn’t beat him down.
anyway, for awhile he shows up, picks her up/or I pick her up. No words are exchanged.
Recently he attempted to speak to me(outside the presence of our daughter, I can’t speak to him. I can’t, I don’t know why. Now he is fixated on the fact that I won’t speak to him in person at drop offs. This has him angry for some reason. Says I’m hurting our daughter.
twice he’s drunkenly texted further insults regarding me being humourless, can’t read(a text I didn’t get was a snide joke) “a retard could understand this/that”
I’m not rude, I just feel an uncontrollable need to get away from him.
can anyone tell me if he can take her away from me for being “uncooperative” in regards to speaking to him?

I can't make head nor tail of most of that but to answer your question, keep communication in writing and only engage if it's about your child or sorting practical arrangements. Ignore anything else. If he gets abusive then suggest a co-parenting app.

It's very important to be able to show in court that you've always been reasonable.

I’m aware it’s hard to follow. I don’t think I’ve ever felt like I’m losing it as much as I have over this. I apologise. When I say every second of every waking moment this has consumed me? I mean it. I don’t know anyone other than he and his family. None of us have a pot to piss in, so I don’t think anyone’s going to start litigating. I just don’t understand his obsession for me to have a chat at handovers nor his insistence that I’m hurting our daughter if I don’t.
I just can’t. It takes everything in me not to kiss her and take off running.
PTSD from a house invasion/assault a few years ago for reference.
Feels similar
and yes, I’ve told him texting is perfectly adequate regarding our child.

was hit with more insults about how pathetic I am and how it isn’t practical

Is it possible for you to take your dd, book yourself a flight back to the UK (I'm assuming you are not here) and stay with family or friends until you get back on your feet?

See a solicitor in the UK about your rights. It sounds like you are stuck in your partner's home country and have been deserted with nothing.

Don't apologise, I didn't intend to be critical. Are you comfortable saying which country you're in? Maybe someone can refer you to local charities who can help.

I am from the States and relocated here for my partner.
I do not have family back home. He is a citizen but we had lived for years in the US.
He has about $10k debt there, which is now mine.
My daughter’s life is here. Everyone she loves is here. She can see a doctor without thousands in medical bills.
I suppose I just was wondering if not engaging in a bit of back and forth actually hurts her?
Im not aggressive or scowling.
Outside of him approaching me outside of her presence, he doesn’t initiate any type of communication.
i can’t be sure, but I think he may be more aggravated at my lack of response to him more than any concern for our daughter.
Ive been kind of steamrolled for quite a bit by he and his family under the pretence that I’m not doing what’s right for her if I don’t acquiesce or if I’m distressed by the constant lack of communication regarding splitting the house, whose claiming as primary, who is getting all the furniture, when to split the joint account, etc.
However, the only ones literally eating off the floor is she and I when it’s my time with her.
Im under a different name for privacy concerns