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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Divorce advice please

8 replies

DesperateToDivorce · 03/07/2025 22:06

I'd be extremely greatful for any advice please!

Basic jist is that I was married to my husband for less than a year before we split. He continued to live in the family home for a further six months after the split but he stayed downstairs.

We have been separated for 10 years. We have 3 children who he has had no contact with for over 8 years.

We were in a relationship for 14 years, nearly one was being married. Throughout the relationship he was abusive, violent and had affairs. I was petrified to leave him.

When he did eventually leave the family home he was issued with a police PIN notice (2016 so could be called something else now) which told him to stop being abusive and threatening to hurt me.

I have absolutely no idea where he lives, no contact number but do have an email address which a quick Google check shows is active. We lived in a rented housing association property which is in my name and have no assets or funds to split. After many years the CMS did manage to get him to pay child maintenance which is paid via a deduction of earnings order.

Basically I need to know how easy it's going to be for me to get a divorce when I don't have an address. I have an extremely low income due to being a carer for my disabled son so money is so very tight (hence why I have not sorted the divorce sooner) so need this to be as cheap as possible for me.

I've looked online but I'm absolutely bamboozled and struggling so if anyone has been in the same boat or can just point me in the right direction I would greatly appreciate it.

Thank you in advance

OP posts:
lljkk · 03/07/2025 22:25

I'm not following why you say you have no address.

DesperateToDivorce · 03/07/2025 22:27

lljkk · 03/07/2025 22:25

I'm not following why you say you have no address.

Sorry, I should of been clearer. I have no address details for my husband

OP posts:
YesThatsATurdOnTheRug · 03/07/2025 22:44

That was how I read it OP. It's perfectly possible but will cost at least £100 more annoyingly. Is there no one you could ask for his address? Any of his family or friends you know of?

DesperateToDivorce · 03/07/2025 22:48

YesThatsATurdOnTheRug · 03/07/2025 22:44

That was how I read it OP. It's perfectly possible but will cost at least £100 more annoyingly. Is there no one you could ask for his address? Any of his family or friends you know of?

His mum passed away some years back and whilst I know that he has siblings but I don't know where they live as they have moved from the last address I knew of for them. We didn't really have any contact with his family throughout our relationship in all honesty, they were an extremely disjointed family.

I've searched social media and no joy with either him or his siblings.

It's just a minefield.

The fact you've said it's possible gives me hope but you're right, yet more expense isn't the one!

OP posts:
YesThatsATurdOnTheRug · 03/07/2025 22:49

Oh it absolutely will happen, you just have to demonstrate to the court that you've done all you can to find him which costs a couple of extra forms as a minimum (so £612 initial fee then £53 per extra form). It should be fairly simple to do yourself online, hopefully the instructions will be clear!

DesperateToDivorce · 03/07/2025 22:54

YesThatsATurdOnTheRug · 03/07/2025 22:49

Oh it absolutely will happen, you just have to demonstrate to the court that you've done all you can to find him which costs a couple of extra forms as a minimum (so £612 initial fee then £53 per extra form). It should be fairly simple to do yourself online, hopefully the instructions will be clear!

Thank you so much for the advice, I do appreciate it.

I'll be looking to do this in the morning.

OP posts:
Sprogonthetyne · 03/07/2025 22:58

YesThatsATurdOnTheRug · 03/07/2025 22:49

Oh it absolutely will happen, you just have to demonstrate to the court that you've done all you can to find him which costs a couple of extra forms as a minimum (so £612 initial fee then £53 per extra form). It should be fairly simple to do yourself online, hopefully the instructions will be clear!

If the op is on a low income, she can get the court fees paid.

www.gov.uk/get-help-with-court-fees

DesperateToDivorce · 04/07/2025 14:24

Sprogonthetyne · 03/07/2025 22:58

If the op is on a low income, she can get the court fees paid.

www.gov.uk/get-help-with-court-fees

I didn't know this, thank you so much

OP posts:
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