DS refusing to come and see my new place

[RainbowLlamas]

Ex and I have recently separated and our teenager took it very badly. He is opening up to his Dad more than me and refuses to talk to me when I suggest he comes to view my new place where he will eventually stay half of his time.

I’m worried sick. I’m still living in the family home but I will need to move out in the next few weeks or the next month. He loves his home and doesn’t want anything to change. He won’t even discuss selecting any of his things to put in his new room. Ex holds the trump card by being the one to remain. I’m so scared that I’m going to lose DS 😢

DS did say that he might come down only if ex drives us both down, ideally it would just be the two of us, I didn’t want ex involved if possible.

Help! I really don’t know how to handle this. I understand it is early days though.

You are just stuck between a rock and a hard place. I wouldn’t force the issue with him tbh. Is your break up bad or can you work together for the best interests of your son. Could your ex encourage him to go with you. It’s very hard, big hugs

Ex and I are on good terms and are friendly. Yes he would be happy to encourage our son to view the place and get used to the idea. It’s very difficult as ex works long hours so he will need to stay with me eventually. I can’t force things though. It’s so difficult, I didn’t expect him to be so resistant. I worry that he will hate staying with me and will eventually choose his Dad.

If you’re friendly then listen to DS and let his dad come too. His dad showing that it’s ok may help him accept it himself

I am pleased that your ex will support you. You and ex do need to talk this through. Had a friend who they both tried to spoil son to gain points and it absolutely ended in disaster. He is a spoilt rat. So make sure you and ex are clear and are on the same page. Best of luck 🤞