Seperate finances

[Monsterstep]

Hi, my husband and I have very recently decided to split. (Less than a month). He is saying that anything he does financially that isn’t to do with the house is non of my business now. This includes borrowing money, selling his car (which he was gifted) and only contributing half towards the household bills with no extra towards child maintenance. He is still officially living in the family home.

I have a solicitors appointment this week but I just wondered if anyone has any knowledge on how soon after deciding to separate finances become completely separate.

To add he has been financially abusive and racked up lots of debt over the years, he has always been dishonest about his income which I have recently found out and this includes when I was on Mat leave and was struggling to get by on what I thought was our joint income.

Tia.

I suppose it depends on what you define as household bills?
Of course he should be paying towards children's clothing, trips, presents, other home expenses etc.
But in terms of borrowing money, buying and selling cars etc, lot's of couples do that individually and have their own finances when married or seperated, without seeking permission from their partner. As in, whatever salary they have left over after paying an agreed monthly amount into a joint accout for all bills and kids expenses, is theirs to do what they please with.

My understanding is that once you say you are separating it's officially you/him.

Are you aware you can apply for universal credit now? Child benifit? Maybe CMS unless 50/50 Child care.

Do you have mortgage?
Bills need to be paid but there is no law on who should pay them.

Debt gained when married will need to be discussed with financial agreement on who will pay it back. If he's selling things to remove assets I'd move forward as soon as you can.

Technically he’s correct. He can spend his income and can get loans etc which he could pre split. He is unlikely to have to pay half of mortgage and bills and cms. You could start claiming that but then he’s likely to reduce contribution to household costs

what you need to understand and fathers any financials
his earnings
your earning
house value
mortgage
other assets -savings, pensions, etc
other debts - loans, car finance etc

because the answer lies in those. You’ll need to work on a division of assets and to be completely financially separate
if he does move out there’ll be even less to provide for bills and cms if he has to rent elsewhere

To add, a court will not look favourably if he’s seen to be depleting assets and running up debts but sometimes not much is done about it

youd be best to close any joint accounts etc and have completely separate ones.
loans are slightly different - if he goes off and takes one to spend on frivolous stuff for himself - that’s his debt. If he takes a loan out to cover joint bills /expenses that can be argued as a joint debt

If you are living separately within the home you can apply for universal credit if eligible but not CM as he’s still living in family home. There’s info on gov uk website and MoneySavingExpert about making sure you sever ties so he can’t take out loans that affect your credit eg joint credit cards.
do you both have a car or is this the family car?
Are you on the mortgage and deeds? If not on deeds register your home rights with Land Registry so he can’t borrow against house.
Do a benefits calculation of staying put / moving out with dc and renting. Sometimes with abusive partners it’s better to be the one to go and remove the financial power over you. Finances tend to get sorted much quicker that way. Plus CM may be payable if you lived elsewhere
moneysavingexpert has audit on how you can save money. Cancel anything non essential eg tv subscriptions
Perhaps call his bluff and say you will leave with dc and he can pay the bills himself.
UC will pay for rent for a period while a house is sold / financial settlement sorted.
make sure any benefits eg CB are paid into a sole account in your name