Sense of disbelief

[Bienbien]

My stbxh left the family home about three weeks ago after saying he didn’t love me anymore and wasn’t happy. So it’s all really fresh. I remain in the house with the kids. He still does the school drop off every morning but that’s about it. Minimal contact. I have seen a solicitor will file for divorce at some point. I swing between boiling rage and heart stopping grief. And sometimes I can’t believe that this is actually happening in my life. It’s almost like watching a movie.

Not sure what I am looking for but posting this on here. Just a rant I guess.

The shock/disbelief thing I can totally relate to - especially in the middle of the night. At the end of the day it is a huge shock and massive change. Food I normally like I feel like I can’t stomach, feel very anxious sometimes…just look after yourself, you’re bound to be feeling like this. I am looking forward to hopefully being used to it and a new normal, not sure when that will be though. I reassure myself I’m alive, count my blessings and the more I’m dealing with things alone and parenting alone the more I’m getting used to being on my own. Good luck x

Sorry to hear this op.
Do you have friends or family to lean on?
It's the hardest thing I've ever been through and I had to go on medication for a while to function and get through it.

It slowly gets easier. Be very kind to yourself and just try to take things one day at a time.

I’m on sertraline. It’s so bizarre. Nobody gets married thinking they will be single again. I tell myself that loads of people get divorced and are ok. Not sure when the ok comes though. I’m so angry but still in the middle of the night I wish that he would come back. Self esteem is scraping the barrel.

Hi OP. I’m in the same boat as you. My whole world changed overnight. It’s awful. He’s moved on so quickly and doesn’t seem to care that my world has fallen apart. It’s so shit.

Take care of yourself. Small sips of water. Tea with sugar. Nuts. Keep eating and drinking. Nap when you can.

Look up the grief cycle. It totally applies to this kind of situation, not just bereavements, as you are grieving for your lost future/marriage etc. When I saw the different emotions in the cycle it made so much sense of how I was feeling. Please also note it doesn't go in a straight line so you can jump around from anger to disbelief and denial etc and then back again and all is perfectly normal. Hope that helps a little.