Will our consent order be rejected? Worried

[freakinthespreadsheets]

STBXH and I are waiting for our decree nisi/conditional order at the end of the month to then be able to apply for our financial consent order. I am 24, STBXH is 31 and we have been married 3 years. No kids and both still living in the marital home at present (it needs some tarting up to go on the market as there are small areas of unfinished plastering etc).

So far STBXH has been quite amicable about the split of assets etc and we want to go for a Quickie Divorce-type consent order. Simple affairs, one property (mortgaged), no other valuable assets. We split bills 50-50. He has one DD from a previous relationship he pays maintenance for.

I am however worried that I will end up losing my savings or having to pay him money because what we are proposing is not exactly 50/50 and i earn more. I am planning to consult a solicitor but while I wait to speak to someone I wonder if someone with some experience might ease my anxiety please?

I earn 36k and him around 30k (I think, he got a pay rise after we split).

We have a "shared savings" pot of about 3k (currently but it fluctuates) that will go on the divorce fees, estate agent/solicitor fees for the house sale and any materials to finish the house up - we top this up 50-50 every month to keep it going.

We are planning to keep our own cars , each worth about 4k i think.

Pensions we said we'll just keep our own - mine is worth 5k, his I have no idea but probably more as although I've been out earning him slightly since I was 21 and started contributing he's been contributing 3 times as long.

Savings - I've no idea what he has, as we always kept our "own" pots of spends/savings after shared bills and savings (which are now the shared divorce savings) were sorted. I've got about 14k, as I didn't spend much during the marriage and have topped this up a lot in the 7 months since we've split as I got a new job and a pay rise.

The house we plan to sell and split the equity 50-50. 170k mortgage, probably get 220k for it if we are lucky.

I'm worried about protecting my savings as it was my choice to be frugal and save my money, and his choice to spend his money on other things (nothing tangible) during the relationship.

The form also asks if we are intending to cohabit with a new relationship (i am, and i want to move in with him once the house is on the market as its affecting my mental health to live here but I can't afford to pay half the bills and mortgage on the marital home as well as rent elsewhere on my own).

Will a judge deem our agreed consent order to be unfair and reject it does anyone think? I have read all sorts online about them getting rejected if it is "unfair" but it's what we both want (albeit i think he wouldn't argue if a judge told me to pay him more). Im seeing a solicitor in a few weeks but would love to quell my anxiety in the meantime.

Thank you.

I’m afraid I can’t help, but would a judge really go against both parties wishes?

I really hope not!
I also have a student loan of around 11k from an open uni course I did online. But I don't think that's considered a marital debt

Honestly unless one of you will be destitute you'll be fine. It was a short marriage and you're leaving with what you came in with. It will get past the judge I wouldn't worry.

If the order appears to be ‘unfair’ the Judge will ask for an explanation. One important question is have you both had legal advice, the Judge would be concerned if one party hadn't had legal advice and on the face of it that party wasn’t receiving a fair share of the assets.

Thank you. I am hoping it will be this straightforward. He's being OK at the mo but I think if he got a sniff that he could get more out of me he might turn

Thanks. We are both going to get what we are proposing reviewed by a solicitor but worth getting opinions if it is vaguely reasonable as I don't want to pay lots of fees changing it about

If it fail is to meet “fair settlement” , yes
there are older post here where that has happened

The first criteria, a court applies on consent orders is, does it meet “fair settlement”.
this is the law on divorce. It is a set of around 8 criteria that must be applied (where applicable) to ensure the settlement is “fair” in eyes of law. It is there to ensure no party ends up dependant on state, or with that risk later in life to the benefit of the other party. It was known by law lords developing it as law of “shared misery”!

it is a common misunderstanding that settlements starts with 50:50. It doesn’t. “Fair settlement” comes first. If there are enough asset the courts like 50:50, but it is not mandated

you need to look up those criteria on “fair settlement” and understand fully how it works in your spepcifc circumstances (both of you) . Go to top of this board and click on link to ADVICE NOW. Download their DIY guides and read, and read more until you understand fair settlement and the process to get a concept order through.

if your proposal meets “fair settlement” it is worthwhile putting in some explanation (brief) in the application on the D81 form (there a comment space), to show court you’re aware it’s not 50:50 but your both happy and this is why.

and as others have said, both get even the bare minimum legal advice and get both solicitors names on your legal draft consent order to show you’ve both taken that legal advice. In my case my exh didn’t want to see a solicitor, I forced him, he had 45 mins and his solicitor was named on the consent order. I wanted this as it wasn’t even, and I wanted court to know he understood the implications.

in your case with no kids you share, shortish marriage, and relatively young, a non 50:50 you’ve both agreed on shouldn’t be an issue, provided you can both manage to buy or rent property.

the biggest issue you have is his child. On fair settlement, that dc needs will come first. The court will want to ensure he has provision for housing, so child can stay and that he can provide for his child. Yep, child isn’t yours, but this dc of his will always be top of thst fair settlement criteria to be met.

I can’t recommend these ADVICE NOW guides enough. Divorced in 2021 using them. Mine and exh legal expenses around £1400 including court costs, by consent order, minimal solicitor input…I read and knew the spepcifc tasks the solicitor needed to do. Guides very good at telling you what you need solicitor for, what you don’t, and when you might.

Thank you this is really useful.
He pays maintenance for DD to shut his ex up basically but has never seen her since she was born in 2020 much less has visitation. He's not even on the birth certificate. Hoping that works in my favour somewhat.

Thanks again

If his pension is likely bigger then yours then that can always be used as leverage e.g. Im not touching your pension if I can keep my savings.

The only thing to think about is that if you are living with the new boyfriend (or possibly intending to perhaps) then you may be considered 'adequately house' and therefore require less of the assets. It might be worth delaying the move. It's seems unlikely to cause issues in the circumstances after such a short marriage but that's why you were asked about that.

I recently divorced, different circumstances but the financial split was heavily weighted in my favour. Far, far more unequal than what you are proposing, and with higher amounts. I also earn more than him, and again there's a greater disparity between our salaries and the ones you've outlined.
The judge rejected it, which we'd expected really, and we had to write a joint letter explaining the circumstances and why we were both happy with the split as it was. It was an amicable divorce and we genuinely agreed on what we would each walk away with.
Thankfully it was then accepted.
Do take legal advice, my lawyer was invaluable throughout, and really explained things to me well.