Co parenting in the holidays

[User1963637]

Hello,

my ex and I have a 2-2-3 50/50 shared care arrangement for our daughter, which has been working well so far. She is starting school soon and so we will need to divide holidays. Please could anyone share splits that have worked for them? And particularly how you share time over Christmas.

thank you in advance!

Hello @User1963637 - I was about to.post a similar question, so following here for some advice

We don’t have 50/50 for the longer holidays we stick to the usual routine as it works and the kids really struggle with change.

For half terms we tend to do a split based around “our” weekends. So if it starts on his weekend, he’ll do Saturday-Tuesday evening then I’ll have Wednesday-his usual Tuesday.

Christmas we alternate, with hand over always on Christmas Eve, either just before or just after church depending on if I’m getting them or dropping off.

The most useful thing we do is have a shared online calendar. Every single child related piece of info goes onto it so we both know what’s going on at all times.

We've gone for 7 day splits over holidays.

Means we can agree the calendar early on, and if either of us wants to book holidays up (with, or without the kids), there's less jiggling about required.

7 days feels like a long time in one go, but its just something we've all had to adapt to - and so far, so good.

Haven't tackled Christmas yet though ...

If the timing works, can't you continue it over the holidays, with the proviso that specific negotiation might be necessary to facilitate time away, with the understanding that each one would be responsible for childcare during "their" days.

Christmas is trickier but I'd assume you alternative christmas and just flex the usual arrangement accordingly?

We tend to keep to the normal routine on the week holidays, so the 2/2/3 depending on whose weekend they break up on. We usually do a week each for the end of term holidays (2 weeks) and generally a mixture of both in the summer holidays. We co-parent well and agree most of this at the start of the year with the occasional swap if something comes up.

DS has always spent from the day he breaks up from school until Boxing day, with me. His dad collects him on Boxing day morning and brings him back on New Years Eve morning. Then he spends the last few days with me.

That way his dad can drink unrestricted on Christmas day and New Years Eve, DS doesn't see his dad drunk (I hope) and it suits everyone.

Thank you everyone! Really appreciate the replies. My preference would be to stick with the 2-2-3 over half terms etc as it works so well currently (unless one of us wanted to book a week away and then happy to be flexible) but ex is insisting that we must book weekly blocks.