Finally told him

[idontknow1001]

hiya everyone. Posted on here a few times about the problems in relationship (over 20 years). Finally told him last night. He knew things weren’t great but thought we’d be able to sort it out (we can’t). Anyway for now we are planning on co parenting, sorting out finances whilst still living in same house separate bedrooms but this has been the case for a long time. Just wanting some positive experiences or anything that people can suggest? I know all relationships are different and I do think we will be able to go on like this for now. Our kids are only little and for them at the minute nothing will change. Hugs to anyone needing it right now.

Of course things should change for your children
and so they should
for the better
they won’t be living with parents arguing and basically constant tension

how old are your children?

In your shoes, I’d be researching recommended family solicitors rather than expecting to just “sort” finances and co parenting

You don’t need to rush straight to solicitors.

if you’re able to sit down and talk civilly you can sort a lot out yourselves ( and good solicitors would encourage that)

you need to think and separate the immediate short term
who will pay what
will you tell children
how will it work in the same house etc

then medium to long term
will you sell the house
will one buy out the other
where will you live
will you share children 50:50 or some other
etC

many couples ( inc me) are able to do this

Thanks for your replies!

we’ve both said we need to keep communicating and talking. I think it’s just been bubbling away and Joe it’s out there in a burning shock even though it’s what I want. Finding a lot of good advice and support from similar threads!

Well done for having the conversation first of all. I hope you’re doing ok. What is your plan for the house, are you going to sell? How old are your children? I think the main thing is for you both to agree what you’re going to do before communicating this to the children.

wishing you all the best.