Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Original poster

Other side requesting Occupational Health Assessment?

13 replies

Parmaviolet1719 · 11/04/2025 22:03

Hi, this is a pretty specific question so I’m not sure anyone will be able to help, but thought I’d try asking.
Currently going through financial relief proceedings. We’ve exchanged disclosures and have a first hearing in May. Other side are now asking for me to have an occupational health assessment done, to assess my ability to work. For background, I’ve been a SAHM for 8+ years. I was diagnosed with an incurable form of cancer in 2021. I’m get universal credit, that’s what I live on. They were previously bugging me for the results of my work capability assessment, but I’d never had one done. So I went through the process and was classed as unfit for work and work-related activity (LCWRA). Clearly this wasn’t what they were hoping for, so now they want this OH assessment. I feel like this isn’t reasonable. I’ve been assessed as unfit for work, they are just annoyed as I’m trying to remain in the family home and being unwell and unable to work obviously will go in my favour in that regard. I just know that if I refuse, they’ll claim it’s evidence of me withholding info. Does anyone have thoughts? Thank you.

OP posts:
lawsly · 11/04/2025 22:45

I don’t think they have any right to ask for that. They are not your employer.

AnneLovesGilbert · 11/04/2025 22:50

Do you have a lawyer?

CaptainFuture · 11/04/2025 22:50

It's bugger all to do with them, they can sod off! only way I can think they'd have any and a very stretched any need to know is if you were claiming spousal maintenance by stating you were unable to work and needed them to fund you?

Original poster
Parmaviolet1719 · 11/04/2025 23:28

CaptainFuture · 11/04/2025 22:50

It's bugger all to do with them, they can sod off! only way I can think they'd have any and a very stretched any need to know is if you were claiming spousal maintenance by stating you were unable to work and needed them to fund you?

Edited

That’s my thinking too. I get no spousal maintenance, no child maintenance, nothing from him. And I’m not asking for anything like that either. Thank you for responding.

OP posts:
Original poster
Parmaviolet1719 · 11/04/2025 23:29

AnneLovesGilbert · 11/04/2025 22:50

Do you have a lawyer?

Yes I do, I just can’t speak to her now until Tuesday to get her thoughts on it, and of course it’s going to be on my mind all weekend so I thought I’d see what others had to say about it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Parmaviolet1719 · 11/04/2025 23:31

lawsly · 11/04/2025 22:45

I don’t think they have any right to ask for that. They are not your employer.

Thank you, that’s what I was thinking too. These assessments seem to only really be done in the context of a workplace. I think they’re just getting desperate to portray me as workshy for no reason. But I’d obviously much rather have a job and not have cancer!

OP posts:
INeedAnotherName · 12/04/2025 00:09

I think I would answer that the government has declared you unfit to work and if they disagree then they need to take the government on. But that is probably too aggressive for a divorce hearing 😬

I also thought Occ,Health was employment only too.

There are ways to say no. Perhaps the best way (with solicitor approval) is to say LWCRA already covers it and an assessment is duplicating the process.

millymollymoomoo · 12/04/2025 08:50

I don’t know if legally they can ask

if you’re expecting to stay in the house /take all equity, /or ex to pay mortgage to keep you in it etc, then I personally wouldn’t be happy with that and would be asking questions/challenging that.

what are you asking for as settlement ?

Original poster
Parmaviolet1719 · 12/04/2025 08:55

millymollymoomoo · 12/04/2025 08:50

I don’t know if legally they can ask

if you’re expecting to stay in the house /take all equity, /or ex to pay mortgage to keep you in it etc, then I personally wouldn’t be happy with that and would be asking questions/challenging that.

what are you asking for as settlement ?

I’m asking to stay in the family home until our youngest child (who is disabled) is 18. I need him to keep his name on the mortgage, but I’m going to take on the full payment myself. And then we’ll sell and split the equity, I would like at least 60% but I’m not asking for it all. Im definitely not asking for anything outrageous. He just wants the house sold and is doing anything he can to make that happen.

OP posts:
millymollymoomoo · 12/04/2025 08:58

I think it will come down to what he earns and what £ are being tied up fir a decade impacting his ability to mortgage and buy.

but it sounds like you have a good case esp if your child has disabilities too

just follow your solicitors advice

Original poster
Parmaviolet1719 · 12/04/2025 08:58

INeedAnotherName · 12/04/2025 00:09

I think I would answer that the government has declared you unfit to work and if they disagree then they need to take the government on. But that is probably too aggressive for a divorce hearing 😬

I also thought Occ,Health was employment only too.

There are ways to say no. Perhaps the best way (with solicitor approval) is to say LWCRA already covers it and an assessment is duplicating the process.

I definitely feel like the DWP assessment should be more than sufficient, hopefully my solicitor agrees!

OP posts:
TizerorFizz · 12/04/2025 09:10

Any future home he buys will now be classed as a second home with financial penalties. Therefore he’s being put in a poor position financially. Many people think agreements many years ahead are difficult too as you aren’t financially separated. Their side will want his money out of the house and for you to buy another one. They are exploring the avenues for you doing that. It might not look like he’s giving you money but your solution is a huge cost to him if he wants another property. This is why many divorced people do have to sell when they divorce. Not many years later. I’m not sure that letting this run and run is the best idea for anyone.

Original poster
Parmaviolet1719 · 12/04/2025 09:16

TizerorFizz · 12/04/2025 09:10

Any future home he buys will now be classed as a second home with financial penalties. Therefore he’s being put in a poor position financially. Many people think agreements many years ahead are difficult too as you aren’t financially separated. Their side will want his money out of the house and for you to buy another one. They are exploring the avenues for you doing that. It might not look like he’s giving you money but your solution is a huge cost to him if he wants another property. This is why many divorced people do have to sell when they divorce. Not many years later. I’m not sure that letting this run and run is the best idea for anyone.

I’m aware of the pros and cons of it, for both sides. I’d much rather be financially separated from him, but I need to be able to put a roof over the kids heads (and my own) and if we sell, I won’t be able to do that. I’d get my share of the equity which would mean losing my benefits as they are means-tested. Leaving me with no income, and an amount of money nowhere near big enough to get a place myself. And no-one in their right mind would rent to me knowing I have no income. I’d be completely screwed. I appreciate that it wouldn’t be ideal for him, but he earns enough to manage quite easily without the house being sold. He just expects to walk away scot free.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page