50/50 shared care - should I claim child benefit

[HardyCat]

I currently have a 50/50 childcare split with my 3 boys staying with me exact equal times! I currently work full time but do take one or 2 morning off a week to look after my 3 year old before he goes to afternoon nursery and work longer hours when I don’t have my children to make up for it. I am in a tricky position as my ex claims universal credit as she is only part time and gets more that way than working full time. She also claims child benefit for the children as she always has and I have never questioned it as thought it was only right that she gets this. She now has started to claim child maintenance from me which is £300 per month, after speaking with child maintenance they said she is entitled to this as she claims the child benefit even though they know we have equal share! They told me the only thing to do is contact child benefit and tell them we have 50/50 care and they will stop the benefit for her as I am unable to claim anyway because of my earning! So if I do this she will lose out on £260 a month for the benefit plus my £300 I give her but if I do this then I will be £300 better off, as I go halves on everything anyway, haircuts, clothing, after school clubs etc! Not sure what I should do and what is morally right to do, any advice I would appreciate

So you’re bitching about your ex not working full time and maximising her income but a year ago you were warning 90k and now you’re only earning 60k?

Op in your case there should be a nil assessment. Get onto cms, dispute their assessment

and op ex is taking the piss . his salary is not large, is paying her debt ( that she at least in part benefited from) has children equally.

stop paying any extras and tell her to use the cms, you now pay nothing more ( while you sort out cms )

@HardyCat CB starts to be paid back at £60K and all paid back at £80K. You wouldn't be paying any back if you earn under £60K as the thresholds changed last year.

You are being taken for a mug - if you are on 50.50 you should not be paying any maintenance especially with earnings so close. 20k v 200k is another matter but you should be paying no CMS from what I see

Op, what's with the drop in income? Is it an actual drop or is all going towards a pension etc?

Is there a reason why your ex wife has decided to pursue Child Maintenance after a whole year of not?

Put a claim into CB for your kids. They will send you document with questions on how frequently do DC sleep at your accommodation, who washes their clothes, who cooks their meals etc. you just fill in honestly and explain how many nights a fortnight DC sleep at your accommodation. They then will decide who can claim CB. They'll likely give you both 1 DC and not sure about third DC. Either way you then go back to CMS with evidence you get CB for at least 1 DC and do 50/50 care. You should not be paying CMS to your ex wife of £300 per month especially if you go halves on haircuts, clothing, school trips etc. you could alternatively contact your exw and tell her unless she withdraws her claim for CMS what you will do in terms of CB counterclaim. If she has sense she will likely just withdraw the CMS and keep claiming CB for all 3 DC. If you earn under £80k you can keep some of the CB if you claim it and under £60k you would get it all to keep.

@Sofiewoo I don't see the OP saying he ever earned £90K so where have you got this from?
Before last April the threshold for paying back all the CB was £60K so I'm surmising OP thought this was still the case.

@HardyCat the threshold to start paying back CB is now £60K with it all paid back at £80K

His previous post asking about divorce financials states his income was 90k.

A post on this thread or another thread?

Op started a thread on the division of assets in his divorce last year. He stated that he earned 90k.

Ah right. Haven't seen that one

Another option is stop paying 50:50 and just pay the maintenance via CMS.

Yeah the easiest thing to do is say now you have CMS I wont pay the 50/50 split of expenses as the CMS will cover it.
She'll still get the CB &UC so you both should be happy

Talk with your ex and come to some agreement with her otherwise you will have to contact child benefit.

I've seen the exact reverse of this recently. She put in the claim for CMS, he's going to claim CB so that he's seen as a primary carer and doesn't have to pay CMS, and she's freaking out because it means she'll be down CB and he won't get it because he earns too much.

I can't remember what inspired her claim in the first place.

This attitude shows the sexism faces by men in ever been seen as an equal parent. From what the OP has said in his posts he is a full 50-50 parent already shouldering half the costs of all extras like trips and then the costs when his children are with him. She has chosen part time work, whilst he is full time. This means she is entitled to benefits which is our state set up. However to then expect more from her ex for her life choices when he has taken responsibility to be a parent is just morally wrong and I really do think it's an indictment on our society that people are still blindly standing up for her and against the OP on that basis.

This.

the amount of times I’ve seen “he only wants 50:50 to avoid paying maintenance”

we’ll here you have a father working full time and parenting his children 50%.

you have a mum working part time and parenting her children 50%.

her choice to work PT means she has less money. So why should he subsidise that?

she wants more money, she works more. It’s clearly possible to work full time around the kids as he is managing it.

Thanks for all the responses, some more beneficial than others and something I need to think about. Just for clarity yes a year ago I was earning just short of £90k but since the separation and my childcare arrangements my business has taken a hit and I’m unable to take the money I was which is why my earnings are down! Hopefully this is only temporary until my youngest starts full time school in 18 months or so! But to be honest it’s a hit I’m willing to take to spend quality time with my children in the younger years as it goes too quick! Still unsure as to what to do, yes she filled for child maintenance and it’s gone back and forth for months, my concern is if I go down the route of child benefit and hers halves and I don’t have to pay maintenance she will then go down spousal maintenance which she has also mentioned to me! Thanks again everyone

This

tho I guess why youngest is under 3 she won’t have to work longer but once at school so 2yrs or so she will have to earn the min floor and work more hours

Isn't this all forming part of the divorce negotiations? It doesn't really matter what a bunch of randoms say on the Internet nor indeed how incensed people are about CM being paid even when 50/50. That's only one half of the story. Use your solicitors to discuss what's fair considering that her career has been somewhat impacted by going part-time for the last decade.

So why have you complained several times what your ex is choosing to work part time when you have also reduced your working and therefore income in order to suit the children?
You can’t have it all one way. Your OP was “I shouldn’t have to pay maintenance because she works part time” when you’re not saying it’s impossible for you to maintain a full work schedule while having the kids 50/50. The same is obviously true for her.

There is near zero chance of a successful spousal maintenance on your salary

the same might be true for op ex working part time - but op doesn’t have to foot the bill for that choice when he’s already having 50:50 and paying half of all other costs.

op ex wants more money she needs to work more, it’s that’s simple.

Not complaining just stating a fact! She could work full time but chooses not to as she is financially better off with benefits to stay part time! I on the other hand don’t have the option of part time as it’s my business and get no help! Why should I have to pay maintenance when I have children 50/50 doesn’t make sense to be but the system doesn’t make sense anyway! No doubt sofiewoo you play the system

If it’s the same post I read, then it was greed. Which every poster told her, yet she still thought she was right.

Theres so much bad advice on this thread. Cms has been awarded based on the fact the ex claims CB, it’s nothing to do with either parents’ income.

So the answer is for @HardyCat to either

1. apply for CB himself so he doesn’t have to pay maintenance on a 50/50 arrangement.
2. speak to ex and let her know he will no longer be paying half of all expenses, as the maintenance will cover this
3. appeal the cms decision. This may end up going to tribunal and he’ll need to prove having 50/50 care with split expenses.

It doesnt really matter what anyone's view of her are and whether she should be work full time though does it? Plenty of solicitors and mediation services outline the CM may still be payable in 50/50, so the advice to OP should be to speak to a solicitor.

www.hampshiremediation.co.uk/do-i-still-have-to-pay-child-maintenance-if-we-have-shared-care/