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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

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Original poster

Sharing court order wth school

10 replies

Sarahd3342 · 28/03/2025 17:38

Am I allowed to share the court order with my child's school? The school asked for it and said they have received some off other parents for other children.

I read online and it said I might have to request permission from the court. How do I request permission from the court?

Thanks

OP posts:

Mumof3confused · 28/03/2025 17:50

The court order itself should say what you can/can’t do with it.

ConfusedNoMore · 28/03/2025 17:52

I told school they couldn't have a copy because of this. They accepted what I told them.

Original poster

Sarahd3342 · 29/03/2025 03:44

I would only share it to the safeguarding lead...are they allowed to see it?

OP posts:

ohhhvienna · 29/03/2025 05:41

i shared mine with the school safeguarding lead and the GP practice manager. this was to prove the Live with Order. once that was awarded the ex started interfering in day to day decision making on my part despite showing no interest before because he's an abusive sulky excuse if a human. it wouldn't be in the children's best interests to have decisions i've made to be undermined just because he would take the polar opposite stance even if it was ridiculous or even harmful. PR gives him responsibilities not rights and the Live with Order shows professionals that a judge has deemed me more than capable of making appropriate day to day decisions.
i have a copy with the passports for travel abroad as well so if a random border force official in any given country can read it i don't see why school would be a problem.
unless the order specifically excludes sharing with professionals i'd say it promotes the children's best interests and aids devision making. you can't post it online or SM or pin it to the wall of a pub because that has no benefit for the children and would be detrimental to them. it would also be breach of confidentiality and contempt of court. that being said if you don't want school to have it and that wouldn't be detrimental to the children's well being you don't have to share it.
i'm in no way legally trained but have learned a lot as litigant in person.
if in any doubt you can email the court with the case number and ask. i've always found them to be helpful.

Original poster

Sarahd3342 · 29/03/2025 07:38

@ohhhvienna ahh thank you. That is a very helpful comment. Wow, I didn't know that about the lives with order. He wanted 50/50 and joint lives. I thought as we both had PR we both were equal. The outcome is lives with me and spends time with alt weekends (overnights). Do you know how I can find the court email? I have been googling but it just comes up with the generic .gov website annoyingly.

OP posts:

ohhhvienna · 29/03/2025 08:18

ring the generic helpline and they can give you it. make sure you have the case reference number as it makes things much easier.
people think the live with order is just to take them on holiday and in case the ex doesn't return them after contact but it does give a say on day to day decisions. people also misunderstand PR for example a parent can seek out information eg from school about their child but school don't and shouldn't be actively informing the other party if day to day matters. an eg might be, child has been given a detention and if needs to be agreed which evening that will take place. if it has no impact on the other parents time with the child it's not their decision to make. depending on how you communicate you may choose to inform the other parent but you aren't obliged to legally as you only need to consult about significant decisions like changing schools for eg.
i've had to clue up as school in my case have took it open themselves to give ex a regular little round up of bits and bobs because ex uses not communicating with me as a form of post desperation abuse. school are running up his arse but in effect are undermining my Live with Order. he has pulled the full on victim act and has got one person feeling sorry for him. i'm addressing it but it's hard work!

ohhhvienna · 29/03/2025 08:19

post separation not desperation. although it feels desperate at times!

AquaCritic · 21/03/2026 09:04

Legal definition of parental responsibility

Parental responsibility (PR) is defined in section 3(1) Children Act 1989 as:

> “all the rights, duties, powers, responsibilities and authority which by law a parent of a child has in relation to the child and his property”. [1][2][3]

In practice, this covers major decisions (education, medical treatment, religion, where the child lives) and day‑to‑day care, with a focus on the child’s welfare.[2][4]

How PR applies after divorce or separation

*Marriage/divorce: Both parents automatically have PR, and divorce does not remove it* — it continues until the child is 18 (or 16 for some matters).[2][5][6]
*Unmarried fathers*: Automatically have PR if named on the birth certificate (post‑Dec 2003), or via court order, parental responsibility agreement, etc.[2][7]
PR is *shared* and exercised jointly where possible; no parent can unilaterally end the other’s PR without a court order (rare).[2][5][8]

Effect of a lives‑with order

A *Child Arrangements Order saying the child “lives with” one parent (sole lives‑with) does not* affect the other parent’s PR.[6][9][10]
The parent the child does not live with *still* has full PR and is entitled to:

- Information about health, education, SEN. - Involvement in major decisions (school choice, medical treatment). - Copies of school reports, GP letters, etc.

The only exception is taking the child abroad without consent (max 28 days if lives‑with parent), but even then PR remains.[6]
Schools, GPs and NHS must treat *both* parents with PR equally unless a court order restricts it.[11][12]

BookArt55 · 21/03/2026 11:43

I had to ask permission to share it with the school and nursery, so it was added in that I could share points 1,5,8 or whatever it was. I then had to black out the points the school and nursery were not allowed to see.
My barrister told me this and helped me get it put in after the court date.
Unfortunately, Family courts have this secrecy type thing about court orders which is madness when it needs to be shared when abusive ex's are causing havoc for the safety parent and children.

Youshouldbestrongerthanme · 21/03/2026 11:51

I shared ours with the school as they then knew when I would be collecting and when it would be my ex-husband. It was a very acrimonous separation with a controlling ex so it was imperative the school knew the 50/50 in terms of who had the children that particular week. It certainly gave me reassurance.

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