Ex moving back to village - Am I being daft?

[VividWriter]

Been separated 2.5 months (together over 20 years) and my partner moved out the family home. Just found out they've started renting somewhere less than a five minute walk from my house and I'm likely going to see alot more of them.

The original plan was for me to buy them out the family home, but I'm now having serious doubts.

I'm worried about breaking clear boundaries with the kids, having a lack of privacy, and just it generally being a struggle to get over the relationship. Being a small village, everyone is usually in each others business. I started dating recently, and it made it back to the kids within a matter of hours :(

Trying to find some positives in a situation I'm struggling with. Things have moved from amicable, to pretty nasty in a matter of days.

Does anyone have any good experiences of living so close to your ex, so close after separation? Any advice?

Yes we were close and it made life very easy for the kids. Only really intersected at hand overs, parties and life events. Which you do anyway.

I know this is not the point of your post, as is judge-y but ... You have been separated 2.5 months and have recently started dating?

Dont see a problem with that - we all work at different speeds and have different wants.

In my case I was dating within a month - but had been checked out the marriage for the previous 12 months so emotionally fine

Re: OP - the benefit is kids can just walk to each others. My ex is a mile away, seen her (unplanned) 3 times in two years so may not be an everyday thing.

Buy him out, sell the place. Move elsewhere. Fresh start for all of you.

Sorry OP, but it really has nothing to do with you where he lives. He is near the kids, which is ideal.

My ex moved back 5 doors away from me and dcs after about 5 years.
It caused many problems as he constantly disrupted our normal routine.
It came in handy a couple of times during emergencies.
On balance I preferred to ignore him as much as was possible.

It’s better for the children if he lives close by. We were always within walking difference and it made it so much easier for the kids especially as they grew into teens

Thank you all for this ♥️

I'd say depends how old the kids are and how active a dad he his. If they are still children/under 18 then close is good, they can see him as much as they want.
If they are nearly adult/able to drive then I'd be less keen.

I live walking distance from my ex. We did it deliberately to make life easy for the kids.
In reality I found it difficult seeing him in the park etc. I tended to use slightly different stores ie the ones in the opposite direction to him for local shops so that I didnt bump into him. But now years later I dont care so much.
It has definitely made things easier foe the kids though

I live close to my ex. We do 50/50 kids are a bit older so can largely manage this themselves. We take turns about for dinner/ cooked breakfast on weekends. We are polite most of the time.

I’ve decided not to date until Dc are uni age partly because I can’t be bothered and partly because I really disliked my stepdad and don’t feel like stepparents often add to a child’s life especially during those tricky teenage years. I wouldn’t be bothered if he had a new love interest though.

It could be a great thing or an awful thing. It could mean the kids could come and go easily between homes, keep their local friends and clubs without disruption.