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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

…at the ‘should I withdraw the divorce application’ stage

4 replies

Alenasally · 08/03/2025 01:39

I don’t know where to turn right now. I wonder if anyone else is or has been in this situation that could possibly offer me support/advice.
I have been married for 7 years, I have a 24 year old son living with us.
My husband & I have been through some drama in the last couple of years, house flooding, my health, my sons disfunctional behaviour.
My husband is very financially secure, and the house etc is all in his name, and I am not privy to any of his financial details & never have been.
I am at the 2nd stage of the divorce process, he literally begged me not to. And he thinks I’ve withdrawn the application but I haven’t, and I’m afraid to tell him.
I literally have nothing without him and despite him actually behaving very kindly since he found out I still want to go my own way, as I’m just not happy.
I was a single parent for 14 years & just want to be in control of my life. He holds all the cards & I feel ungrateful as technically I should feel lucky to be blessed with a lovely home with no debt, but I don’t. I am sure I would be happier but he will really make my life hell if I tell him I don’t want to be with him.
My son also creates a lot of drama and their relationship is shite, and I’m constantly in the middle of their rows too.
I would love to find strength from others who are or have been in a similar situation.

OP posts:
iamnotalemon · 08/03/2025 01:41

I am sure I would be happier but he will really make my life hell if I tell him I don’t want to be with him.

I think this is your answer. The fact that he'd make your life hell speaks volumes.

Write down all the reasons you want to divorce him and when you feel wobbly, read those reasons again x

ThatDoesntWorkForMe · 08/03/2025 01:44

It sounds like you know what you want to do, and you deserve to be happy. Do you have a good solicitor to help you with the financial side?

CaptainFuture · 08/03/2025 01:50

Is 7 years a short marriage? Did your husband expect your adult son to be living with you?
Are you working and contributing to the home?
It would be highly 'cock lodging and money grubbing to expect to come away from the relationship with monies from him.
Why not just leave and support yourself? You must have done so 8 years ago?

Alenasally · 09/03/2025 02:09

‘Cock lodging’????

OP posts:
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