Maintenance -WWYD?!

[Walesmam23]

Ex and I are in mediation but had come to an agreement over child maintenance, we have another session to discuss consent order finalities but he’d agreed to pay more child maintenance for our child as he earns considerably more than me.

Today is the day he pays and he’s paid at the old rate not the one agreed in mediation. I don’t know whether to raise it or not as I know mediation isn’t legally binding but he also made a big noise about being ‘happy to help’ and not wanting to see us ‘struggle’ to the mediator (despite happily watching me struggle for the last 18 months!)

Would you say anything or leave it till the consent order is approved?

Absolutely mention it, even if just as you spot have paid at the old rate, I presume after all you said t the last session this was a mistake so please top it up today.. if he says no then clearly he can’t be trusted and it factors in to the rest of the mediation process.

please bear in mind maintenance can revert to the CMs level after one year so don’t accept a lesser deal elsewhere for more maintenance.

If there is any spousal maintenance element as well then try to have the spousal and child maintenance included as ‘global maintenance’ in the consent order. This cannot be overturned after 12 months by going to CMS, unlike the child maintenance clause.

Is he a very high earner?

As it would be better to go to Court separately for child maintenance.

Otherwise as already stated after a year he can just go to the CMS and get assessed.

Obviously mention it. It shows his words aren't worth much... When he inevitably does other things to suit himself taking him back to court will be easy..

Yes mention it. Agreements are exactly that. Things you agree to do

Is it paid by DD and didn't get a chance to update before the payment went through

Exactly how much dosh we talking about here?

Yes mention it but in a "not sure if you realise but you haven't changed the standing order for maintenance yet" way imply that it's automated and it's been over looked so you are light hearted rather than annoyed

Thanks so much for the replies I really appreciate it. I’ve not mentioned anything, I know it’s pathetic but I don’t feel strong enough and couldn’t handle the fight. He knows what he’s doing, he’ll know that he’s got the amount wrong and will have done it on purpose. He does what he wants and doesn’t care. A couple of other things have happened since my post which have shown me that once again, he had his new GF and her son stay over at his and let the son share a room with my daughter for some of the night (son decided he didn’t want to during the night) even though I’d said I wanted to discuss that with him before it happened (they are both young but for a number of reasons I’m not comfortable with it and wanted to discuss it with him, he agreed we’d discuss it and he went and did it anyway) and he’s booked to take my daughter abroad with his gf and her son without once speaking t me about it first. Am I wrong to feel he should? Anyway I’ve another mediation session this week so will bring the maintenance up in that as I’ll feel stronger doing that with someone else present.

@Reugny hes not a crazy high earner, earns circa £85k to my £36k (inc UC, my actual salary is £18k) so a lot more than me but not enough to fall into ‘high earner’ I don’t think x