What happens if you don't sign joint application?

[PinkGorilla]

On Wednesday my husband filled out a divorce application and said he wanted it to be joint. So I was then emailed the incomplete application to fill out my part. But I really don't want a divorce! I know I can't stop him from divorcing me, but it's against what I want to fill out a joint application. Shall I just not sign it and he'll have to submit a sole application if he's that adamant he wants a divorce?

What’s the point

you don’t stand to gain anything and might actually build animosity which won’t be helpful

What are you trying to achieve? There is no outcome from refusing that can possibly be good for you mental health. Whether you hate him, fear him or love him there is nothing to be gained from refusing the divorce. You are better off with him out of you life and head.

If you depend on him financially then you are wasting money on a fight you cannot win.

I'm not sure. I'm guess I'm in denial still. He did it on impulse during an argument and a tiny part of me is hoping he'll change his mind

If it's a sole applicant then they have to pay, but are also in charge of the timeline. This means they could ask for the decree absolute before the financial consent has been signed off by the judge.

Is the reason he wants joint is to share the costs?

This is why there is a cooling off period…there is 20wks of ‘nothing’ to follow this so if you did resolve something/decide to try again then the process can stop.

If he did this because of one argument alone it would be an extreme overreaction. Possibly a sign of abuse or coercion- abusive people threaten extreme things and hand out ultimatums at the drop of a hat. It is very difficult to hold onto the anger or resentment of even the most heated argument for days unless you have very little emotional or even rational intelligence. He is either being abusive or he is very immature. Either way you need to rethink whether you want this type of person in your life.

It could of course be the case that this isn’t one argument but the last thing in a long line of things that mean he has had enough. But most people don’t split and then file within days. You manage the separation and give the other person time to come to terms with the decision. Unless a huge line has been crossed.

There are a lot of signs this is not a functional relationship. Maybe there is enough to try and for you both to have counselling. But if there are no children and not much to keep you together this is a wake up call. Either do a lot of work on yourselves and the marriage or split.