Ex left in the summer. He took ages to decide what he actually wants to do and I waited three months for him to let me know whether he's staying in the country or not. We've got two DC and I'm on maternity leave. He's been seeing DC1 regularly and I'm trying to be flexible with visits. He hasn't seen DC2 since early October.
I've now got my solicitor on the case to sort out maintenance, which he refuses to pay because he wants to do 50:50. He isn't doing 50:50, though, but blames me for refusing.
He's insisted on taking DC1 out of his private school (which is have always paid for in full) and for DC2 to attend a nursery "in the community", so not the one attached to the private school. I work there, so get a huge fee discount.
I've offered to buy him out, but the amount isn't high enough for him. (It was 50% of the equity.)
Since the house now needs to be sold (his idea is to keep paying 50:50 of the mortgage), I'm planning on moving with the kids. We have no established relationships here. DC don't attend clubs or have friends in the area. We'd move to where my family live. They'd be able to go to state school/nursery there and be part of the community and integrate (we are abroad but the plan had been to move back to the UK when DC1 was at secondary...that's obviously not happening now). Their grandparents would be close by and available to help out. I've got a new job lined up and would be able to reduce my hours.
He's now refusing to let us move. It's 30 minutes away but because he's relying on public transport, he wouldn't be able to take DC1 to school anymore. Visitation would have to change.
I'm getting fed up, really. I've tried to make things work and organise schooling and housing to fit everyone's needs but he just vetoed everything. I've now made the decision to move. It's the best option available for the kids and for me. For once, I've not based it on his needs and demands. He's now accusing me of just making decisions without him (I bloody well tried but he's not actually offering anything). He wants me to reduce my hours at my current employer, for the kids to go to school in this area. It's more expensive, it's more hassle and it means I have less support. He's not changing anything. He has no support network. He expects me to keep DC when he "has" to go to a work's do or work later or there's an INSET day. Equally, he demands to have DC1 more often. It's not workable...and completely ridiculous.
Seriously...AIBU to move? (I know, wrong section but still...)