Ex not taking their belongings and always delaying

[Walkingbliss]

Hi just wondered if anyone has advised or knows where i stand with this.

A little be of background My ex who now 3 years ago was removed form our rented family home he was found guilty with assault by beating and a restraining order granted, as well as while he was bailed i had an emergency nonmolestion order granted.

These have now all expired and although for several years he has asked for his stuff i have been fully happy for this yet he refused to send a list through my solicitor.

Now have no solicitor or orders in place he has again since October asked for his stuff date aggreed him sending lists of items he then says cant make it.

Next Sunday is the agreed date again he has also sent yet another list and mentioned that he hasn’t been able to get a van so can’t take everything (if he even shows up that is)

I jusy cant help but feel he is using this as a tactic to keep in contact via our patenting email to arrange to get the remainder of his stuff that he can’t fit in his car.

Am i able to just get rid of his stuff that he doesn’t take I feel i have been more that fair and allowed plenty of time and given lots of opportunities for him to get his things and just want this final thing to be over but also don’t want him to be able to say ive done wrong.

I know he will already say to the children I am and has clearly used the kids for information on yhe wearabout of his belongings as i can tell my his emails.

Sorry know was a long post any advice would be greatly appreciated x

Don’t let him in the house. I would have it all sat in the front garden. What he doesn’t take stays there

Do you know his parents or any of his family? Coukd you arrange that any remainder will be delivered to their house so it’s out of your house?

Do the lists all say the same thing, is it a lot of stuff, can it be put in a garage or spare room. I'd be inclined to pack it all up, arrange delivery and then ignore him.,

I had an ex who refused to move his trailer from my garden. After a few months of asking, I told him I'd found a buyer who would be collecting it on Friday, and I'd be keeping the proceeds as storage fees.

Oddly enough it disappeared on Thursday while I was at work. 😊

Tell your ex you've called in a house clearance man who is paying you £20 for the whole lot.

Just cut the cord.

Bag up his stuff and put it it on the street on a certain day. Tell him in advance. And if he doesn’t collect it just ket ut go with the rubbish. If he asks about it later just say “I assumed you collected it as any normal adult would.”

Repeat this as needed. If he asks for any specific thing just say it went out with the rest.

Its been in my spare room for 3 years and as he hasn’t really been kind I don’t want to pay to have it delivered considering most of the items that are his on his list i had actually paid for as he was consistently out or work or spending all his and my money on illegal substances and alcohol

He lives with his parents so they are already aware of it needing to be gone

Does he see the kids? If so, can't he just take some stuff when he picks them up?

Send it to his dps in a taxi if it isn't far... Worth the fare imo.

yeah i definitely wont be letting him in the house chance!

How much stuff is there

Tell him you are no longer prepared to store his belongings, he has seven days to collect them after which you will take them to the tip. Communicate by text message and keep the message in case he tries to argue that you didn't give him any warning.

Get in touch with him and his parents and ask them to collect it by a certain date or you’ll be disposing of it.

Give him a deadline to collect his stuff. Do you have a garage or shed it can go in so he doesn't have access to the house?

Be explicit. He collects his stuff on 20th February (for example) otherwise it will be going to the tip. Oh... and make sure you have this in writing where he can't delete it, eg email or the court app.

I sold my exes stuff after 2 years!

I suggest you do the same! I found it very satisfying.

If it fits in your spare room, why can't it fit in the car? Is it large items of furniture?And if you paid for most of it, who says it is his?
Your next steps depend on whether you can move the stuff to get it out of the house and to the dump yourself!

3 years you've kept an exes stuff. Bizarre legally you didn't have to if he left the property and stopped paying on it. Not sure why you would even want to interact after all that time if he was so bad. If you really want him to have the stuff you could easily have also dropped it at his parents front a long time ago done and dusted if he his playing about not getting it himself. Or you could have binned it

He does see them and have suggested that over the years now the kids are bigger he doesn’t collect them or ever drop them off they just travel to him themselves