Where can I get the money to buy him out?

[Marmalade7219]

House has been on the market for a few months now and things have dried up. Divorce has been going on a long time. Basically, it’s a 50/50 split of the house between both of us. I’m still in the house, which is way too big now it’s just me and my daughter (and, she sometimes stays with her dad).

We have reduced the asking price already and the estate agent has asked to reduce it again. Stbx has offered it to me for £250k. So, I’d need to find £125k to do that. I’m reluctant to reduce the house asking price as it’s worth more. Plus, it’s leaving me with even less to get another home (for context, stbx has another property he owns that he now lives in). I am paying off solicitor fees so this is having an impact on my disposable income so to fund a mortgage, at the age of almost 53, is going to be too much. Plus, if I stayed in the family home, I’d be paying bills and maintenance on 4 bed detached house when I don’t need a house this size. I’d rather have a smaller house. higher disposable income and a good night’s sleep each night. If I got a mortgage to cover the £125k then I’d end up with little disposable income and no life/no money to pay for unexpected bills. Plus, my pension lump sum at 60 would be swallowed up.

Is there any way around this without reducing the house even more??

Op, if you don’t have the 125 and don’t wish a mortgage, and don’t wish to take it from your pension, I cannot see how you can do it. The only way is to borrow and you can’t afford it. I don’t understand why you want to buy him out if you want a smaller house, just sell for what you can get, and then get your smaller place.

It’s because the house isn’t selling and the estate agent wants to reduce it further means any 50% I get will be less. I have already accepted a lot less from this that I should’ve done.

Just drop the price a little. It’s worth what people will pay. Market might pick up as we come into spring.

I think it’s looking like I’ll have to though.

Estate agent have asked to drop by another 2%

"Stbx has offered it to me for £250k. " What does this mean? You pay him 250k? Surelyif it's a 50/50 split you pay him 50% of the market rate to buy him out, not a figure that he makes up. Have you had the house valued independently?

Do you have a solicitor?

OP, gently, if your house is on the market, well presented, with a good estate agent, and is not selling, it’s because it’s not worth more. It’s clearly worth a bit less than you thought. That’s a shame, but holding on for a price that’s not going to happen is unlikely to be helpful. I would take your agents’ advice and cut the price.

You don't try and find the money as you don't want or need the house. Why should you make his life easier by handing him a stack of cash and make it all your problem? Especially as the house may be overvalued, so you would be giving him more than he is due. Callenge back that he can have it if he gives you £125k.

But realistically, it sounds like you may need to come to terms with it being worth less than you think. Are you splitting everything 50/50? Why does he have a whole other property and what about pensions and savings?

It’s on for £270k. He has said he will drop to £250k if I buy him out.

I can’t afford to pay a solicitor anymore.

This. Is he splitting his other assets, especially his pension?

If he has another house (does he own it outright?) the value of this goes in the pot - he might offer you half the marital home, but what's your share of the other house?

Remember all assets are in the 'pot', your solicitor should be advising you better on this!

Have a look and post on the wikivorce forum op - saved me a fortune as well as getting some actual advice from legal folks (rather than randomers on mumsnet).

If you buy to him out for £125,000 you lose £125,000 to start with but have an asset worth £250,000.

If you sell the house for £250,000 to a stranger you get £125,000 to do what you want with. Yes, you’d get more if it sold for £270,000 but if it doesn’t sell it’s a moot point.

If you don’t want the asset then don’t buy it.

You can pay the solicitor at the end when the house sells, you don't need to pay as you go. It sounds like you are being short-changed here. Starting point is half of ALL assets. If you are looking after children I would be pushing for 80pc. I got 70/30 in my divorce and we had no children.

If the house is too big would you be prepared to let out a room or two?

So if it sells for £270k on the open market you get £135k each (which you seem to be happy with)... But if it sells for £250k you get £125k each... which he would be happy with.

So unless you really need to hold out for a sale at £270k (how important is that extra £10k to you?)... why not drop the sale price to £260k or even £250k and get it over with?

Don't end up £125k in debt and with a house that you don't really want / can't afford.

Have you no equity in the house?

Estate agents seem to overestimate the price of a property

I assume to get the initial agreement to sell with them

They then decrease the price to a more realistic level once you are with them

Basically they probably told you it was worth more than it was

You will not get offers until it is the correct price

People will view lots of properties and will not have any connection to yours

Try and view it how they would view it and look at other properties and be realistic

Why does he have another house?

Have you pooled all assets

Get three estate agent quotes and go with the middle one and give him half the equity

What happened with regards to his other home in your divorce?

Thanks for all of your advice.

Yes, I was short-changed and ripped off by solicitors. But, I need to move on with my life. I definitely don’t want to end up paying out all of my disposable income on another mortgage, especially after being mortgage free for a number of years (and it was me that overpaid the first mortgage). I’m at an age now, and after a few tragedies recently, where I want to live my life a bit more. Travel, have long weekends away etc.

I’m going to reduce the asking price and look for something smaller.