Just ended my marriage of 30years

[Traceyhousewife57]

Hi I have just ended my marriage of 30 years with my husband because of the argument he keeps starting with me for no reason what so ever and blaming me for everything and not taking any blame him self he keeps starting the same argument with me and we are going over the same thing all the time and he is always blaming me and will not take any blame him self

Did he ever pause for breath, and did he get fed up of you using the word ‘blame’?

And how to you feel? Relieved? Excited for the future?

Upset because its not what I wanted

I can understand that. You wanted a loving and supportive partner but he's never going to be one is he? Based on the knowledge that he isn't a kind or supportive partner can you explain why you are upset - based on the now, not the past or your wants/dreams. If you met him last month and he behaved like he is, would you have wanted to stay around?

You can feel upset knowing he will never be the man you thought he was, to have your dreams and future shattered. Losing what you thought you had (not what you actually have) can take on a form of grief.

It was a very long marriage that I ended

Yes, I read it in your first line. I ended mine of 40 years and I'm relieved it's over as the last few years have been very painful living with him. He wasn't the man I married, he wasn't kind, considerate, thoughtful or supportive.

But I guess you don't really want to talk it through and that's fine. I wish you peace and happiness moving forwards